Billy Zane

Billy's big splash Lessons: Without such excellent swimming instruction, who knows what kind of career this actor would have had.

I am sitting by my phone, waiting for a man to call. I thought getting married would end that phase in my life, but that's another story.

The man in question is Billy Zane, much in demand since "Titanic's" titanic opening over the weekend. Over the last decade, Billy has gone from his memorable debut in "Dead Calm" to the title role in "The Phantom," but "Titanic" is the first film that allows him to show the full range of everything I once taught him.

Swim, Billy, swim! Rotate that knee, Billy. The elementary backstroke uses a whip kick, Billy, not a flutter kick.

A million years ago or so, I was a swimming counselor at Harand...