Normally when someone clogs up the local boat launch, especially during the summer, they're likely to get a few sideways looks and maybe an angry grunt or two from those less patient. But on this steamy July day, no one seemed particularly put out by the vessel occupying both lanes of the Corsica River ramp.
My guess is because, if the folks waiting are anything like me, they too were intrigued by the boat doing the clogging. It wasn't your typical center console or family bowrider. Far from it. It was the Chesapeake Bay log canoe, built by Billie P. Hall in 1903. As only one of a dozen or so of her kind left, she's a living embodiment of the traditional Chesapeake racer that has plied Eastern Shore waters since the middle 1800s.
That gorgeous diversion aside, most ramps around the Bay are very busy places on the weekends, especially when the rockfish are snapping as hungrily they have been. Most folks are expedient in the launching of their craft; others, well, not so much.
It's painful to watch someone struggle backing down a ramp. The fact is some people need to hone their trailering skills in a parking lot before unleashing their game on the rest of us. It'd save some angst all the way around. And some of the comments people have uttered make are downright comical. Here are a few of the gems — publishable ones — I've overheard this month:
•"Don't worry about it. It (the boat) should settle itself once we're on the highway." Husband to his wife, when she asked if the vessel being misaligned on the trailer's rollers will pose an issue.
•"Pay attention!! What the #*+@ are you guys doing back there?!" Husband to wife (and/or kids), blaming them for his inept trailering skills that resulted in him jack-knifing the trailer.
•"Keep coming…keep coming…little further…WHOA! WHOA! WHOA! STOP!!"
•"Yikes…I didn't think the ramp would end…"
•"Ummm…was I supposed to wind this rope around that wooden post thingy?" Uttered as both watched the boat drift away from the pier, lucky not too far.
In the spirit of helpfulness, here are a few suggestions that might make launching your boat go as smoothly as possible. Then again, maybe not.
•Get off the phone! It's a boat ramp, not the White House Situation Room. No one gives two shakes how addicted to Pokemon Go you are.
•Hit the bathroom (head) before you launch, not while there are six rigs behind you waiting to drop into the water.
•Move everything (coolers, etc.) from your tow vehicle to the boat long before you're on deck to launch.
•Tell your hipster friends from your frat — "Bra, it was epic!" (Ugh, pretty sure it wasn't) — NOT to park in spaces reserved for trailered rigs, and check his fratastic 'tude when politely asked to move.
•Failure to tie off can muck up the works, big-time. Take few seconds and make fast to a cleat or piling.
•Know your ramp size. Yup, I mean you, 40-foot Miami Vice style "Go Fast" guy. (Isn't Tubbs dead?) It ain't happening. And that goes for knowing how the tides at each ramp figures into your boat's draft.
•Chill out, relax, pump the brakes, take a deep breath. Sure, the guy taking a month of Sunday's just to offload his 15-foot skiff is grating on your nerves almost as bad as a Justin Beiber montage. But remember you were once him (the boater; not the Beebs). No one ever born automatically knew how to expertly launch a boat.
Boaters Tell EPA "No!" To More Ethanol: If the EPA and the biofuels industry have their way, more ethanol will be added to the nation's gasoline supply, and when that happens it's likely to increase the risk of doing damage to even more boat engines, voiding warranties, and leaving boaters stranded on the water, say the country's major boating groups.
The Renewable Fuel Standard, passed more than 10 years ago by Congress and signed into law by then President George W. Bush at a time when most thought gas consumption would rise, calls for an increase in the percentage of ethanol in our fuel supply, starting next year. If enacted, it'd many more gas stations would be forced to carry E15 (15 percent ethanol) and E85 (fuel blend with 85 percent ethanol), leaving consumers with little choice as to what they can put into their boats' tanks.
Chiefly among the concerns are that most marine engines are not designed to run on E15, labeling could confuse boaters filling their tanks, and, the fact that it's actually illegal to use fuel with a higher ethanol content than 10 percent in marine engines.
Since last year, professional charter boat associations (full disclosure: I'm a member of two) and recreational boating groups have banded together to fight the proposed increase. Last week, BoatUS, perhaps the nation's largest recreational boating advocacy group, reported it delivered more than 24,000 comments from its members to EPA headquarters, urging the environmental agency to reconsider its proposal. Here's hoping they listen.
Photos and outdoors calendar listings to cdollar@cdollaroutdoors.com.
Outdoors calendar
Thru Sept. 17: Chesapeake Summer Slam. Five species, throughout the Bay. Sign up at technicalfisherman.com.
July 21: Annual MSSA Northwest Chapter Perch Tournament. 7 a.m. at Podickery Point & Snake Reef, weigh-in at Sandy Point State Park at 12 p.m. Register at mssa.net/perch.
July 18: MSSA Broadneck/Magothy #10 Chapter Meeting, American Legion Post #175, 832 Manhattan Beach Road, Severna Park at 7:30 p.m. Call 410-757-9070.
July 20: MSSA Annapolis #1 Chapter Fishing Trip, Rod N' Reel Docks, Chesapeake Beach at 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Info at mssaannapolis.com.
July 23: CCA-MD 3rd annual Baltimore Kids Catch. Canton Waterfront Park, 3001 Boston St., Baltimore at 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Info at ccamd.org.
July 23: Pasadena Sportfishing Group Kid's Fishing Derby, Downs Park at 7 a.m.-12 p.m. Register at pasadenasportfishing.com
July 25: CAPCA Meeting, Annapolis Elks Lodge #622, 2517 Solomons Island Road, Edgewater. Open to the public meeting starts at 7:15 p.m. Info at capca.net.
July 29-31: Huk's 3rd annual O.C. Big Fish Classic, Talbot Street Peir. Info at 410-213-0325 or bigfishclassic.com.
Aug. 8-12: 2016 White Marlin Open, world's richest billfish tournament. Ocean City, MD. Register at whitemarlinopen.com.
Aug. 13: MSSA's KI Fishing club's Annual Youth Fishing Derby, Romancoke Pier, Route 8 south. 9 a.m.-11a.m. Awards and lunch at Kent Island American Legion #278 from 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m.