Over the course of the rant that follows, Skip Bayless pleads, "Seriously. I'm not just saying that for effect." But again, to remind you, this is Skip Bayless, professional provocateur, so if you want to turn back now, I understand.
Anyway, on Friday, Bayless and "Undisputed" co-commentator Shannon Sharpe were discussing the topic du jour: free-agent quarterback Colin Kaepernick's chances of NFL employment, especially in light of the Ravens' signing of a lowly arena league quarterback.
Over the course of about two minutes in their Kaepernick segment, Bayless tried to talk himself into a take that even he cannot offer without a "That's just me" caveat.
"You know how I feel about Joe Fluke-o, as I call him," he said. "His playoff record is — it's just impeccable. It's inarguable. It's not debatable. He's been sensational in the postseason. Regular season, not so much. So after he beat, barely, Colin Kaepernick in that Super Bowl, they made him the highest-paid player. … Joe Flacco became the highest-paid player in the National Football League, and then they extended him again in 2016 and gave him a bonus that again was a record bonus. For Joe Fluke-o?
"So since the Super Bowl, the Ravens' record is, in the regular season, 31-33. Is that the highest-paid quarterback in pro football? [Editor's note: No, it's not.] And in that time since he won that Super Bowl, Joe Flacco is 19th in completion percentage, only 17th in touchdown passes. and he's thrown the third-most interceptions since he won a Super Bowl. …"
"But, Skip," Sharpe, a former Raven, said. "That's who he is in the regular season."
"That's who he is," Bayless agreed. "But I can make a case, when I look at Colin Kaepernick's regular-season records, he's better than Joe Flacco. Seriously. I'm not just saying that for effect. If you gave me a choice today — again, I can't argue with the postseason, but Kaep's been pretty great in the postseason, too, right? I mean, we don't have the body of work.
"But if I just look at regular season, Kaep's been a little better. And his touchdowns to interceptions in the regular season, Colin Kaepernick: 72 touchdowns to only 30 interceptions. That's his whole body of work in the regular season. Flacco, regular season: 182 touchdowns — pretty good — but 117 interceptions is pretty bad. Well, OK, I can make a case … I think they would be a little better, I would give them a little better chance to go farther, with Colin Kaepernick as their quarterback than Joe Flacco. That's just me."
Sharpe didn't embrace the debate. Instead, he explained why Flacco's leaguewide rankings aren't so great: He's a deep-ball thrower. (At least, he used to be.) Then Sharpe awkwardly transitioned back to Flacco's big deal and how the Ravens "rolled the dice" and Flacco "hit seven."
At this point, I'm obligated to mention that "Undisputed" is struggling for viewership.