⢠"While traveling the country, I can shower with any team I choose."
⢠"George Steinbrenner just offered me $20 million to play again."
⢠"At any moment, there's a good chance Bob Costas is boring someone with stories about me."
⢠"Free chalupa from Taco Bell if I mention them in my induction speech."
⢠"I can now admit I broke my streak in 1998 because I had tickets to Les Miz."
Sound advice
Readers of SI.com are so lucky to be able to turn to former Florida State barely-clad-girl-in-the-football-crowd Jenn Sterger for advice. A recent query sought her counsel on the wisdom of inviting the New York Mets' mascot, Mr. Met, to a wedding reception. Sterger's response:"I see no reason why not if you are a die-hard sports fan. ... I'm not saying make him your best man or anything, but having him as a special 'guest' at the reception would be cool."
Hmm, that gives Mr. Flip an idea - announcing that Mr. Flip is available, for a nominal fee, to attend weddings, confirmations, christenings, bar mitzvahs and any other event you believe would be enlivened by his presence. He promises not to try scoring with any bridesmaids.
However, you might want to order some extra hors d'oeuvres.
Compiled from wire and Web reports by Mr. Flip, who will also coordinate the bag on his head to match your centerpieces.