In Susan Reimer's column ("A woman at the Gray Lady's helm," June 20) she bemoans the apparent need to reassure folks that a successful woman can "kick ass and make a great salad dressing" while there seems no related need to assure that successful men still "cut their own grass." Funny thing is, I see that "reassurance" about women as far, far more than simply a need to show success for a woman doesn't mean having to sacrifice in a way that men do not. I believe most very successful men have lost that balance. Right or wrong, it is still a heavily matriarchal society vis a vis maintaining a home and raising children, due in no small part to the fact that "dad" is so busy working and trying to get ahead that "mom" is left to either sacrifice the corporate fast track or let someone else raise the kids and make the salad dressing.
That "reassurance" is, in fact, a bell ringing endorsement of a successful woman's ability to rise above the expected and sets her apart from the traditional corporate bigwig who typically is praised if he remembers his own child's birthday.
In her closing paragraph Ms. Reimer defines real liberation as when nobody notices when someone moves up or down, regardless of gender. I'll buy that, but I think the greatest change has to come from the men. Only when the highly successful male can both "kick ass and make a great salad dressing" will we be close to how I believe we really want successful women to be viewed.
David G. Cronin, Owing Mills