The second thing that happens is that we immediately identify with the victim. So last week, when a Montgomery County teenage girl said she was raped in the bathroom of her high school, like millions of other survivors, I became that girl. I felt her terror like it was my own until it rose up in my chest like a hot poker. I sobbed for her. I ached for her parents, her friends, her teachers, her siblings. To rape survivors who now have children of our own, that girl is not just us, she is our daughter, too. Our hearts are crushed knowing that she now joins the millions of us who will never again hear about a rape without feeling the intense trauma along with the victim.