After reading Joseph T. Jones Jr.'s op-ed "Driving Away Black Dads" (June 17) I can only shake my head, laugh and think "Here we go again." Another person blaming his, and others, shortcomings on the "system," when in fact, the blame lies squarely on the individuals' shoulders. He blames the system for why so many African-American children are raised in single family homes. He describes a system that creates large bills for young men with no means, which in turn creates animosity between the child's parents. After reading this, I felt I had a few questions.

First, does the author believe that the "system" only affects poor African-American individuals this way? What about the poor whites, Asians and Hispanics? Are they somehow immune to the grip of this system? Second, and more important, Mr. Jones tells us that the government spends nearly $100 billion annually on assistance for fatherless families, and his solution is to expand this assistance! Where exactly is this money coming from in this economy?

I have a better solution. This is what someone should do to Mr. Jones' anecdotal couple of Greg and Kisha, and honestly, what someone should have done 30 years ago with Mr. Jones and the mother of his first son, Trey.

Someone needs to smack these people on the side of the head and say:

"Straighten up! Stop hanging out on the street corner at nights, drinking malt liquor, smoking weed and committing crimes. You're going to be parents now, grow up. Dad, that's right DAD, go get a job digging ditches on a construction crew during the day. The work is hard, but the money's not bad. At night, go to school and get your GED. Mom, you can take night classes as well. Learn to type. Above all else, care for your child. No one promises this will be easy, but you, as parents, will feel much more pride in yourself by providing, rather than begging for help from the government.

"Here's another idea, get married! I know, people will tell you 'Having a kid is not a good reason to get married.' Bull! Having a child is the best reason to get married. The baby isn't asking to be born, but what it needs is for it's parents to stop being selfish, and put the baby's needs to the forefront. Kids only cost a lot if you allow them too. It cost nothing to take them to the park, or the library, to just spend time with them. It costs very little to clothe them from the Goodwill, or even Wal-Mart. It costs very little to mix up a huge pot of beans, rice and ground chuck to feed your kid for the week. Bland, yes. But your child goes to bed at night with a full stomach and the knowledge that his parents cared enough about him or her to make a hot meal. Now, if you can't do any of these things, your kids should be removed from your care. You are unfit, and a failure. The government should do all it can for the well being of the child, but should not be in the business of subsidizing able bodied people."

Sound harsh? Maybe it is, but I believe this would work better for young, would-be parents of all races than simply expanding an already inefficient, and clearly ineffectual, system.

Rex Fisher, Pasadena