Somebody in North Baltimore ZIP code 21212 offered this for free on Yahoo: "Frozen moose head."
"okay, gross, yes, but this is left from a documentary done on moose," the "freecycle" posting said. "it's frozen, in a large tote, does not have the antlers, from neck up. sooner pick up, the better ... please get it outta here!"
Gotta be a great story there. And I'd like to bring it to you. But for some reason, the lady who posted the thing has been reluctant to go public.
Looked at first like she'd cooperate, and I was all ready with the classic who, what, where: Who'd watch a moose documentary? What happened to the rest of the moose? Where'd she find the freezer space?
"Laura," she wrote, "not too interesting a story, but once the hoards of kids here leave from the playdate, I'll fill you in a bit."
I trust the kids eventually left - and I don't mean frozen and in large totes - but I heard nothing back. So I messaged the moosecicle trafficker again.
"I'm working on dear husband," she wrote. "He's wondering how work will see all this, although I'm not too concerned, since he was responsible for getting rid of it anyway ... why would they care if it was freecycled? He's in a meeting now, so maybe he'll concede after he is out."
He's worried about the boss? I'd be more concerned about PETA.
In any case, that was the last I heard. I'm hoping the woman, who seemed quite nice if awfully mysterious, did not wind up in the Sub-Zero herself.
If you're wondering, somebody out there - I'm guessing really "out there" - did snap up Bullwinkle's noggin.
"thanks for all the strange bizarre responses," the moose head woman wrote on Yahoo a mere four days after she first posted. "it is thankfully gone!"
Let's hope the taker is not so shy. If you're reading this, I'd love to know what you're going to do with the thing. I think.
Might be good to keep the day job
Day job: Towson University vice president.
Nighttime gig: lounge singer.
Gary Rubin, who as vice president of university advancement is in charge of - big breath here - development, philanthropy, marketing and communications at Towson, decided his plate wasn't quite full enough. He turned 60 in August and figured it was finally time to pursue his dream career.
He made a run at professional singing when he was a teenager growing up in Northwest Baltimore. He performed at some country clubs, led campers at Wonderland Day Camp in song. He even auditioned in the New Jersey living room of some guy - he still remembers the name: Mr. Silverman - who represented Bobby Rydell.
But Rubin wound up going the more practical higher-ed route. Until last summer, when the recently widowed Rubin got talking with a friend about life being short and dreams dying hard.
The friend happened to know a Seattle jazz pianist and hooked Rubin up with him. Rubin flew out to the West Coast, rehearsed with the pianist for three days, then performed with him at a lounge called The Pink Door. Back in Baltimore a few months later, he sang (for free) at Della Notte restaurant.
"Talent questionable, but guts, no question," said Rubin, who croons the old Frank Sinatra and Tony Bennett standards but draws his inspiration from Bon Jovi: "I just want to live while I'm alive."
Rubin's next gig is tomorrow night at Della Notte. He also has a one-man show at a Towson U. recital hall in March.
Never too soon to be speculating
Tired of wondering what office the term-limited but still fundraising Baltimore County exec intends to seek, political gossips have found a new source of speculation - in Jim Smith's spokesman.
The buzz at the Arbutus Roundtable last week was that Don Mohler might run for County Council. True?
"The answer is, it's three years until the next election, and as far as I know, Councilman Sam Moxley has not made a definite decision not to run," Mohler told me. If Moxley doesn't run, does that mean Mohler will?
"Three years is an eternity, and now I'm very much enjoying working for Jim Smith."
Connect the dots
Sen. Barbara Mikulski will host a $1,000-a-head fundraiser for Hillary Clinton a week from today, but those big bucks won't buy facetime with the presidential candidate or her husband. At least not right away. Neither Clinton will attend the Annapolis reception with Mikulski, but donors will get access to that event - plus a ticket to some future, up-close-and-personal encounter with either Hillary or Bill. Date and details to be determined. Of course we can trust these people, right? ... In a TV ad, congressional aspirant Andy Harris calls Rep. Wayne Gilchrest and E.J. Pipkin "two tax-and-spend peas in a giant liberal pod." Sound familiar? In the race for comptroller last year, Peter Franchot linked rivals William Donald Schaefer and Janet Owens to then-Gov. Robert Ehrlich, calling them pro-sprawl, pro-slots "peas in a pod." Not the first case of political plagiarism, but should the conservative state senator lift from somebody so liberal?