Clemens' delayed delivery doesn't exactly hit the mark

The Baltimore Sun

News item: Roger Clemens now says that personal trainer Brian McNamee did give him injections several years ago, but all that was injected was the local anesthetic lidocaine and vitamin B-12.

My take: It would be a semiplausible alibi if Clemens had said that in the first day or two after he was named in the Mitchell Report, but any excuse that takes three weeks and a team of lawyers to cook up is going to be a hard sell - even on 60 Minutes tonight.

Related news item: The House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform has shifted gears and decided to call players - including Clemens and Andy Pettitte - to testify at next week's steroid hearings.

My take: Now, you might want to tune in. I wonder whether Roger will point his finger at the committee when he insists he never, ever used illegal performance-enhancing drugs.

News item: The NFL playoffs have begun, and just about everyone seems to think it will be the New England Patriots and Dallas Cowboys in the Super Bowl.

My take: Call me crazy - and to do that you'll have to get in line - but I think it's going to be the Indianapolis Colts and Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

News item: The New York Yankees continue to cast themselves as the favorites to acquire pitching ace Johan Santana from the Minnesota Twins, but no one on either side seems to be in a big hurry to do anything.

My take: That's too bad, because Santana's uncertain status continues to keep the rest of the trade market at bay. The Orioles probably won't deal Erik Bedard before Opening Day, but they'll get a much better idea of his value after Santana is off the block.

News item: Tennessee Titans quarterback Vince Young is a game-time decision for today's playoff game against the San Diego Chargers at Qualcomm Stadium.

My take: I don't think a sore quadriceps is going to keep him out, but it's going to be the Titans' last game of the season either way.

News item: Star first baseman Carlos Delgado said Thursday that the New York Mets were baseball's best team last season, even though they failed to make the playoffs.

My take: I'll give him this: They definitely were the best team ever to blow a seven-game division lead in the last 17 games of a season. Oh, sorry, they were the only team ever to do that.

News item: Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Carson Palmer said Monday that the current coaching staff is not capable of fixing the team after it fell short of the playoffs again this year.

My take: And you thought only Ray Lewis had the juice to undermine his coach with impunity.

News item: Bills quarterback J.P. Losman wants out of Buffalo after bouncing in and out of the starting lineup this season.

My take: Don't even go there. Losman's career numbers, when compared based on games played, are very similar to those of Kyle Boller.

News item: The Boston Herald reported yesterday that the success of Buffalo's outdoor NHL event last week has sports executives thinking about putting a Bruins game at Fenway Park.

My take: They might get more Boston fans if they held it in Baltimore.

News item: The Canadian Football League has bought 300 tons of carbon offsets to make this year's Grey Cup "carbon neutral."

My take: I'm all for trying to offset the supposed human impact on global warming, but this whole carbon credit thing borders on the delusional. It's essentially a program that allows rich people to do whatever they want to the ecosystem, pay someone else to (theoretically) clean up the mess and then lecture the rest of us on our lack of environmental sensitivity.

Listen to Peter Schmuck on WBAL (1090 AM) at noon most Saturdays and Sundays.

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