Lola has been yanked out of her beloved city home by her divorcee mom (Glenne Headly) to live in a suburb with little to challenge the emotive talents of a girl (Lindsay Lohan) who has probably seen Liza Minnelli do Sally Bowles more than is healthy for someone her age.
As a result, she makes up tragic tall tales about her absent father and shows up at school in eccentric getups that say, "Look at me." Carla, the high school's self-anointed It girl (Megan Fox), doesn't stand a chance against this Broadway baby when auditions roll around for the school play, an updated rock version of Pygmalion.
If only Drama Queen hadn't placed its bets on Lohan. In Freaky Friday, Lohan proved herself an eager and capable comedienne. But she has no sense of extravagance: Lola displays little of the flamboyant narcissism that makes these kinds of kids simultaneously compelling and irritating.
Lola gets to wear what appears to be the entire inventory of an East Village vintage clothing boutique, but she's never transformed by her outfits: what we see is merely a perky, freckled teen-age girl in a perpetual state of Halloween.
Fans of the idiotic What a Girl Wants may bliss out. But what a teen-age girl really wants at the movies is what grown-ups want, and not to be talked down to like her kid sister.
Teenage Drama Queen
Starring Lindsay Lohan, Glenne Headley, Megan Fox
Directed by Sara Sugarman
Released by Disney
Rated PG (mild thematic elements, brief language)
Time 86 minutes
Sun Score *1/2