"Saturday Night Live" rolls out its biggest gun of the year to close out the season tonight.
"The Bottom Line" (11 a.m.-noon, WBAL, Channel 11) -- Jodie Ulrich, the teen-ager expelled from Baltimore County's RTC Chesapeake High School for possession of pepper spray, is the guest of substitute host Ron Shapiro.
"Television's Greatest Performances II" (8 p.m.-9 p.m., WMAR, Channel 2) -- Who decides these, anyway? The "classics" include the final episode of "M*A*S*H" (in a Reader's Digest version, one supposes, since the original was a two-hour movie), a "Saturday Night Live" tribute to Gilda Radner (which was honestly moving) and The Judds in their last performance together. ABC.
"Love Potion #9" (9 p.m.-11 p.m., WMAR, Channel 2) -- Notable as the film that first gave us Sandra Bullock, this 1992 effort has little else going for it. Rent "Speed" or "While You Were Sleeping" instead. ABC.
"Hard Target" (9 p.m.-11 p.m., WBAL, Channel 11) -- More slam-bang hooey from Jean-Claude Van Damme. NBC.
"Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman" (1: 35 a.m.-2: 35 a.m., WJZ, Channel 13 and 8 p.m.-9 p.m., WUSA, Channel 9) -- Might this show be changing its name to "Dr. Quinn, Frontier Mother"? Well, it could after tonight's season finale, directed by Jane Seymour's husband, James Keach. CBS.
"Saturday Night Special" (11 p.m.-midnight, WBFF, Channel 45) -- Roseanne's entry into the late-night comedy sweepstakes concludes its first season with a guest appearance from the hottest blonde on TV, Jenny McCarthy of MTV's "Singled Out." Fox.
"Saturday Night Live" (11: 30 p.m.-1 a.m., WBAL, Channel 11) -- Jim Carrey returns to the small screen as host of tonight's season finale, with Soundgarden providing the tunes. NBC.
"Stalking Laura" (1 a.m.-3 a.m., WBAL, Channel 11) -- John-Boy Walton stalks Brooke Shields.
"Atlanta Grand Prix Track & Field Championships" (1 p.m.-3: 30 p.m., TNT) -- Today's competition officially opens Atlanta's Centennial Olympic Stadium, built to hold this summer's Olympic games.
"Scandal in a Small Town" (7 p.m.-9 p.m., E!) -- Raquel Welch plays a barmaid who accuses a teacher of being anti-Semitic, in a movie that was supposed to prove once and for all that Raquel could act. Did it work? Hint: On video, the movie is packaged with a picture of Raquel looking sultry and seductive, with the word "Scandal" in really big letters.
Pub Date: 5/18/96