(with apologies to W.S. Gilbert)
* When you're ready to break
All the markets that make
Exchange rates that roll on forever
I propose you should use
All the yen you can lose
To finance your risky endeavor;
Wait till London's asleep,
To your terminal creep
Making trades so quick and so daring
No one ever will know
What they reap you will sow
But please don't bankrupt poor Baring!
Derivatives high,
Let the futures fall by,
By the time they wake up it's over
You'll be off to Tibet
Where the market's not yet
Discovered something richer than clover;
Meanwhile back on Threadneedle,
The governors wheedle,
They'd like a return on their cash, please;
The Prince is a pauper,
He can't buy a topper
And the palace is in for a rash squeeze;
And just when you're sure
That your money's secure,
There's that nasty old man from the Fed;
just like to know
Where the dollars should go
When Washington gets out of the red.