Are you already sick and tired of replacement players and scab ball?
Fed up with greedy athletes and egomaniac owners?
Disgusted with professional sports in general?
Do you yearn for the good old days when the game was the thing and everything wasn't money, money, money?
Well, I've got a sport for you and you can see it played at its best here this week.
It's indoor lacrosse -- officially known as the Major Indoor Lacrosse League. The local entry is the Baltimore Thunder.
Saturday night at the Arena the Thunder will play Philadelphia. They're the two hottest teams in the league, the Thunder with three straight wins, defending champion Philly with five straight since losing its opener.
Philadelphia is tied with Boston for first place. Baltimore (3-2) is 1 1/2 games out of first.
"We're playing as well as anybody in the league," says Thunder assistant coach John Tucker.
The best lacrosse players in the world, literally, are now playing indoors. Many of those will be in this game.
They include Philadelphia's Gary Gait, probably the greatest offensive player in the sport's history, indoors or out. Naturally Philly has the best offense in the league.
Gait lives in Baltimore and is assistant coach of the women's team at the University of Maryland. His twin brother, Paul, plays for Rochester in the MILL. Together they led SyracuseUniversity to NCAA championships from 1988 to 1990.
Canada-born and reared, the Gaits grew up on the indoor game with its little 4 foot by 4 foot goal. They never saw a 6-by-6 outdoor goal until they got to Syracuse.
"How does anybody ever miss this thing?" they asked Syracuse coach Roy Simmons.
Result: they didn't miss. Not much anyway.
When the indoor league was born eight years ago, it was treated with disdain by many lacrosse purists.
One night I circulated through the crowd at the Arena, asking people what had attracted them. The most common reply: "I come to see the blood, man."
Things have changed -- for the better, I hasten to add. At first the college All-Americans turned up their noses at the MILL with its violence and its $150-a-game paychecks.
After Cornell lost to Johns Hopkins in the NCAA championship game at Rutgers in 1987, I talked with Barbara Angotti, mother of Vince Angotti Jr., then a Cornell freshman midfielder, and wife of Vince Angotti, the former Towson State basketball coach.
"It's good that Vinnie's getting a great education at Cornell," I said. "He'll never be a pro in this sport -- unless he plays indoors."
"Indoor lacrosse!" she shrieked. "Do you think I want my son to get killed?"
Vinnie Jr. has played in the league for five years. He loves it. Unlike pros in other sports, these guys don't play for the money.
"What's happened in the indoor game," says the Thunder's Bobby Martino, another five-year pro, "is that there are better players now and it's more of a skill sport.
"The mayhem has been reduced -- although I have to admit these Canadian guys bang you around pretty good. That's the way they came up playing the game."
The other thing that has improved indoor lacrosse is that the American players, with each passing year, are getting better at it.
The learning period takes longer than many thought it would. Some just don't adapt to indoors.
"A lot of guys are great outdoor players," says Thunder coach Skip Lichtfuss, whose background is in field lacrosse, "and they think they can move right in and play indoors.
"Besides the obvious differences, like being indoors in an enclosed area, there are a lot of subtle differences that take time to learn. I'm still learning the indoor game."
The MILL is packing them in in some cities. In Buffalo, the team sells out every game, 16,000 spectators. In Philadelphia they sell out the Spectrum.
Thunder crowds at the Arena are more upscale than they used to be. More and more purists are embracing the game.
They see many of the same stars they have seen in the outdoor game -- Loyola College's Brian Kroneberger and Paul Cantabene, Towson State's Rob Shek and Lindsay Dixon, Washington College's Martino and Tim Hormes and Johns Hopkins' Jeff Wills. The fans like the connection.
The Philadelphia team is no bunch of strangers either with Gary Gait, Hopkins' Brian Voelker and Syracuse's Tom Marechek, a native Canadian who lives here.
The best players in the MILL are still the Canadians. Gait is the league's leading scorer. Boston's Ted Dowling, a Canadian, is No. 2. All the goalies, including Baltimore's Ted Sawicki, are Canadian. But the U.S. guys are catching up.
Those who saw indoor lacrosse a few years ago and didn't like it owe the game another look. It's a lot better now.
Saturday night would be a good time to check it out.