The TV Repairman:
Lee Corso, ESPN's studio analyst for college football, doesn't mince words, although you probably knew that by now. He calls it "nothing less than a farce" that Nebraska and Penn State can't meet to decide the national championship on the field after they have played and (presumably) won bowl games this weekend.
"Penn State can beat Oregon by 50 in the Rose Bowl [Monday]," he said, "but voters won't change their minds about [No. 1] Nebraska if it goes and beats Miami in the Orange Bowl Sunday night." The Cornhuskers are a one-point underdog.
"I think Nebraska has enough speed and the proper balance to give the Miami defense lots of problems; therefore, I think it will beat Miami in the Orange Bowl at night, which is no easy task," Corso said. "One of the surprises this season is that two teams of the quality of Penn State and Nebraska went undefeated this year. It's a shame they can't square off."
Men, if you catch any flak because Monday's bowl games start at 11 a.m. with Duke meeting Wisconsin in the Hall of Fame and run through the Sugar Bowl at 8:30 p.m. after a couple games Saturday night, mention casually that you said nothing about TBS running old "Leave It To Beaver" shows for 24 hours the other day. Fair's fair.
Gary Bender fans, unite. Your favorite is doing the Outback Steakhouse Gator Bowl tonight at 7:30 on TBS, Tennessee playing Texas Tech. It was either that or 24 more hours of "The Beave," as Wally calls him.
* Ho-hum, the NFL is bragging about another attendance record, an average of 62,656 fans reportedly being on hand for its 224 games. Bull! Games last weekend averaged about 8,000 no-shows, 11,000 deciding to stay away from Giants Stadium where the home team and the Cowboys were in an important game, and the Rams, Bills and Falcons combined for at least 100,000 unsold tickets. What is it they say about statistics?
* Four bowl games are on the picture tube today, the Holiday figuring as the best. Michigan (7-4) is a solid eight-point favorite over Colorado State (10-1), but the Holiday is always Hellzapoppin' with its games averaging about 70 points scored.
* To paraphrase the old public service announcement, it's 8 o'clock, do you know where your daughters are? Sure, at an eight-team tournament of high school girls' teams in Pickerington, Ohio, during the next three days. Highlights on "SportsCenter."
* Joe Theismann usually finishes well back when critics get around to listing the best pro football analysts, which is hard to believe when Joe gets rolling on ESPN.
Of the Raiders, he says, "They have the second-best talent in football. There's no explanation or excuse why they aren't in the playoffs. Offensively, they play to about 40 percent of their capability."
The experts must not be listening too closely.
* Bob Wolff, one of the callers of Bobby Thomson's "Shot heard 'round the world" home run in 1951, celebrated his 50th year on TV by signing another contract with a New York City cable outfit. Wolff graduated Phi Beta Kappa from Duke in 1939 and started his broadcast career the next day on CBS Radio in Durham.
* CBS does women's volleyball (NCAA championship match) at 3 p.m. tomorrow, followed by Tennessee and Vanderbilt on the hardwood. Channel 11 is ducking the v-ball, but checking in for hoops. Monday, however, WBAL shows us how sports-minded it has become as an NBC affiliate by picking up the Cotton and Fiesta bowls.
* While the Peach Bowl is on ESPN Sunday evening, the studio crew of Lee Corso, Craig James and Dan Fowler will be schmoozing from the Miami-Nebraska contest at the Orange Bowl. No false advertising and phony hype touting N.C. State vs. Mississippi State for these people.
* Barely did we get a chance to miss boxing during its holiday hiatus when it's back on next Tuesday (9 p.m.) with Al and "The Champ" checking out Quincy Taylor (23-3) taking on Rodney Toney (19-0) on USA Network. Incidentally, no more news of Fox's expressed intention to run boxing shows at 11 p.m. on Saturday.
* Mark this baby down: The Hula Bowl is on ESPN Jan. 22 at 8 p.m.
* If everybody's so hot and bothered about Cal Ripken's getting hTC the consecutive-games mark in baseball, why not go back and add all the exhibition games he has played over the years?
* HBO has a boxing show a week from tomorrow, Kevin Kelley (40-0) taking on Alejandro Gonzalez (33-2) atop a card of little people. "We've made a breakthrough on HBO and I think it will stick with us because the bantamweights and featherweights provide as good a show as anyone, probably better," says Kelley, the 126-pound champ.
* The more we see and hear of Dennis Rodman in TV commercials, etc., the more obvious it is the hoopster should be left alone -- in a padded cell and straitjacket. . . . Whatever happened to all that business about very bad knees forcing Hulk Hogan to retire (about a half-dozen times)? Why, there was the Hulkster tossing some big dude hither and yon on Starcade the other night.
* Albert Einstein couldn't figure out the Patriots: They lost two, won three, lost four and won seven in that order. . . . How come a lot more wasn't made of tennis player Andre Agassi's giving $1 million to the boys' and girls' clubs of Las Vegas?
* Fox says it's going to get $500,000 for a 30-second ad when the 49ers and Cowboys meet for the NFC title Jan. 15. Thing is, it could probably get more and approach what ABC will charge for the Super Bowl will get two weeks after, $1 million. Worth a try, anyway.
* Coming to a college football screen near you soon: The five interior offensive linemen on one publication's all-U.S. team go 6-8, 297; 6-7, 290; 6-5, 285; 6-8, 280; and 6-6, 280. Did I hear %% someone say they would like to help out with the grocery bill for these lads?
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