Mike Royko is on vacation. We are reprinting some of his favorite columns. This column was originally published on Dec. 28, 1976.
The owner of a downtown Chicago restaurant called me with a problem that frequently comes up at Christmas.
He had planned a party at his place for 100 needy children. But for some reason he had only half that many coming.
Now, with the party only two days off, he was frantically trying to find an extra 50 needy children.
"Do you know where I can get them?" he said.
I asked if he had tried an orphanage. He hadn't, so I gave him the name of one.
He called back a few minutes later and said:
"No luck. They're already taken."
All I could do was suggest that he keep trying, call other orphanages and social agencies.
But I warned him to expect disappointment. He had waited much too long. When you get down to the last week before Christmas, the needy children -- especially orphans -- already have been pretty well picked over.
The problem is that there is such a great demand for them at this time of the year. Everybody wants one at the same time. Just before Christmas, orphanages are bombarded with phone calls from people who want a child for the holidays or for Christmas dinner, or from church or fraternal organizations that want a quantity of them for parties and such. Invariably, many people are disappointed. And there is nothing as depressing as getting the urge just before Christmas to do something good and then not being able to do it.
Last year, on Christmas Eve afternoon, a very angry young woman called. She and some friends had just rounded up old clothes and old toys to give away, but they couldn't find anyone to give them to. They had called several social agencies but they had closed for the day.
Knowing how upsetting such disappointment could be, I tried to be helpful and suggested that they wait until after Christmas when the social agencies reopened, since the clothes and toys would be needed then, too.
"But Christmas will be over then," the woman said, "and it won't be the same."
How true. It is so much more satisfying to help a needy person when the radio stations are playing Christmas carols and lights are strung up all over the city.
It's not the same later, or earlier. One would no more drink eggnog in August than take in an orphan for an ordinary summer weekend.
That's the trouble with supply and demand. Right after Christmas, there are all kinds of needy people available. But by then, most of us are already planning New Year's Eve activities, and that's not the kind of thing you'd have an orphan for, either.
So the idea is to make your plans to help the needy early. As with reservations for New Year's Eve, you can't wait until the last minute.
One should start thinking about these things as early as Thanksgiving -- or before, if possible.
By planning your Christmas good deed early, it gives you a greater variety of choices. (For example, you may prefer an orphan girl to an orphan boy. You might have a preference in sizes, colors, etc. But by the time the holidays are upon us, there's no guarantee that you'll get exactly what you want.)
One of the problems in looking for someone to good-deed is that there is no convenient way to shop around. The Yellow Pages don't list places that carry needy children, and one can't just go into an orphanage, children's hospital, home for the elderly, etc., and browse around.
The newspapers do what they can, ferreting out stories of cold and hungry families, lonely old widows in rooming houses, and so on, but never enough to meet the demand.
What may be needed is some kind of special Christmas catalog, such as Sears and Ward's put out for their merchandise, but containing instead a complete assortment of the needy.
You never can tell, but maybe some people, after looking it over, might decide that they'd rather have an elderly widow rather than a child. And if they knew where to go, they might prefer to drop off the box of groceries right at the home of a poor family, rather than at a church basement distribution center, thus savoring the gratitude directly.
If people had something like that, they could plan calmly and avoid the frantic, last-minute rush to perform a good deed.
Best of all, there wouldn't be any disappointment. Christmas comes but once a year, and everybody should get a chance to do good. It's such a long wait until next time.