Some Christmas traditions are planned. Others just seem to happen.
JoAnn House knows all about accidental traditions. Twenty-five years ago, she invited her parents and an uncle over for Christmas breakfast with her three young children, blissfully unaware of where it would lead. Over the years, that intimate holiday breakfast mushroomed into an annual gathering for dozens of family and friends at the Houses' West Baltimore home. "It just kind of grew," says Mrs. House, a program analyst at the Social Security Administration. "We have about 30 family members. And with friends, there's usually about 50 to 60 people here. Now some of the children are bringing their children."
On Christmas, all the frantic shopping, decorating and preparating will be over. And families all over Maryland will gladly hop off the fast track and retreat into traditions that feel as comfortable as a pair of fuzzy, old slippers.
For the Houses, it is sharing breakfast with nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles, sisters, brothers, cousins and friends. Some of the guests live within walking distance. Others travel from Illinois, Delaware, Texas and Michigan to celebrate the day.
"It's a major time for us. A good time," Mrs. House says. "It's a Christmas morning that includes in-laws, family, friends."
And a whole lot of work for the hostess. The menu includes 16 quiches and mounds of sausage, eggs and biscuits.
To pull it all off, Mrs. House begins grocery shopping early in the month for the shrimp, crab meat, cheeses and other breakfast fixings. On Christmas Eve, Mrs. House, her daughter and a few other relatives gather around the kitchen table and crack about 60 eggs.
Often the preparation takes the entire night before Christmas. "Sometimes, I don't go to bed at all!" Mrs. House says. At 5 a.m., she begins to warm up the food for the 10:30 a.m. breakfast.
"I used to wonder why she would run around so much the night before," Delino House says of his wife of 12 years. Now, Mr. House is just as involved, albeit with different duties.
"Well, I don't get involved with much of the cooking. Although, I may peel some tomatoes and cut up some potatoes. But I do things like taking out the trash and helping with the cleanup," says Mr. House, also a program analyst at Social Security.
One year, Mrs. House considered simplifying the tradition.
"I suggested maybe we could have a continental breakfast along with coffee, tea and juice," she recalls. But her children demanded that everything remain exactly the same.
"Yes, she did try that one year!" says Cynthia Cotton, the youngest of Mrs. House's three children. Ms. Cotton is a 26-year-old medical student at Southern Illinois University at Carbondale.
"I couldn't imagine my mom not doing this," says Ms. Cotton, who arrived home Monday night to be with her family. "I don't get home as much as I did before I went to college. But we all used to help make the quiche pies. That's part of the tradition!" she says.
Rosalyn Smith, 33, has been going to Christmas breakfast at her Aunt JoAnn's since she was a child and has grown to value this family tradition.
"When we were children it was hard for us to pull ourselves away from our new toys," says Ms. Smith, a customer service representative for NationsBank. "We just couldn't understand the special significance for getting together for this."
Age and maturity have a way of opening people's eyes. "This allows us to come together for a time of sharing and praying," says Ms. Smith, who now brings her own daughter.
One thing has changed, though. Each child is allowed to bring his favorite new toy along to the breakfast.
When people begin arriving, some exchange gifts but mostly they catch up with one another. Tables are set up and the group usually divides itself by generations.
"All of the kids get together, and all of the older ones seem to find their way around a table," Mrs. House says.
Everyone joins hands before eating, and the prayer is led by Mrs. House's mother, Ethel Forbes, the matriarch of the family.
"Then everyone just digs in," Mrs. House says.
The food is good, Mr. House says. But it's not the most important thing going on. "The most enjoyable part is the wholesome feeling that we get. All of that work that goes into it just disappears," he says.
"It's special because it is just a part of us," agrees son John Cotton, 29, who also works at Social Security.
"This is the only time for some members of the family to get together," says his aunt Vera Smith. "It's a time to come together and reflect. We sit around and chat. No one wants to go home," Mrs. Forbes says.
The sight of everyone enjoying themselves rejuvenates Mrs. House. "At the end, the tiredness is gone," she says. So what's left?
"There's lots of hugging, lots of smiles. Lots of happy children," she says. "When it is all over that is the main thing I remember."