Angelos vs. Steinbrenner.
That sounds fun.
Angelos vs. the NFL.
Even better.
Officially, it would be Angelos v. NFL -- as in antitrust lawsuit, as in treble damages, as in humiliation for Paul Tagliabue, Jack Kent Cooke and the rest of the anti-Baltimore brigade.
Merry Christmas, Tampa.
You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why.
An-ge-los is coming to town.
Let George Steinbrenner try to keep the Buccaneers in Tampa -- Orioles runner-up Jeffrey Loria can advise him on the perils of bidding against Angelos.
Angelos vs. Steinbrenner would produce the sporting equivalent of nuclear winter, the two egos bombing -- er, bidding -- each other into oblivion.
The Matt Nokes signing was a mere warning shot. Angelos' team can't beat Steinbrenner's on the field, so he's taking the fight upon himself.
Phil Regan should be so feisty.
Angelos thinks he might close the Tampa deal in the next few weeks. Something will happen. You know something will happen. But this amounts to Baltimore's last and best shot.
That said, let's not take Steve "Tell Us A" Story too seriously. Story, one of three trustees operating the Bucs, says Angelos is "up there in the front" of the bidding.
Which leads to the familiar question:
Motive?
As usual, it's rather transparent. Story is trying to create a market, and scare up a hometown bid. Don't be surprised if he proves the latest in a long line of false NFL prophets.
Indeed, this deal could collapse at any moment. The difficulty of moving the Bucs might prove too big an obstacle for Angelos to overcome.
The $200 million question is whether Angelos will assume the majority of the risk, or whether it will fall on the Tampa Bay trustees.
The trustees want protection, presumably through a nonrefundable, multimillion-dollar penalty that would be assessed to Angelos if the transaction is not completed.
Angelos also wants protection, presumably through a discounted price that would ensure he does not pay Baltimore market value if the team remains in Tampa.
It's a treacherous road, and we've been down it before. The difference is, the path is familiar not just to the NFL, but also to Angelos.
Eli Jacobs, remember, wanted no part of our budding sports emperor. He planned to sell the Orioles to Bill DeWitt, but then he entered bankruptcy, and the equation changed overnight.
Angelos won the Orioles' auction, and now he's making the high bid for the Buccaneers. The NFL is a powerful deterrent this time, but one basic fact remains:
Just as a bankruptcy judge sought the highest offer for the Orioles to satisfy Jacobs' creditors, the Tampa Bay trustees are compelled by their own fiduciary responsibility to take the best offer for the Bucs.
The trustees want the team to stay in Tampa. The NFL wants the team to stay in Tampa. But if Angelos offers the high bid by $25 million, who's going to stop him?
Not the trustees, who might be accused of violating their duty to the beneficiaries of the Hugh Culverhouse estate if they accept a lower bid.
And not Tagliabue and Co., no matter how much they fear Angelos, and no matter how much they try to protect the Laurel reject, Jack Kent "2-13" Cooke.
Angelos would have a lawsuit, and not just any lawsuit. He'd receive treble damages under antitrust law. We're talking gonzo dollars. We're talking Asbestos II.
Only Baltimore's CFL team loses to the NFL in court. Angelos would force a settlement by uttering the four most horrifying words known to Tagliabue:
First witness, Al Davis.
Of course, the NFL could turn nasty, and seek a temporary injunction blocking a move. That could delay the outcome for years, and damage Angelos financially.
Would it be worth the trouble?
It doesn't want a lame-duck team in Tampa -- the Bucs are in a strange enough predicament as it is. And the owners might put an end to the Tagliabue-Cooke power play before it starts.
They'll want the $1 million guarantee Baltimore can offer visiting teams. And they'll want the added value to their franchises once the Bucs sell for a record $200 million.
The Bucs won't be as profitable in Tampa unless they get a new, publicly financed stadium, which is unlikely with the ThunderDome sitting empty in St. Petersburg, waiting for major-league baseball.
It's our last and best shot.
Bring on Steinbrenner.
Bring on the NFL.