Confessions of a Corollary Target


New Orleans. The briefers and commentators drew much material today from the descriptive statements of an Iraqi trooper in Baghdad describing his personal survival. Here it is, translated from Arabic by the Army Censorship office for media dispersal:

My name is Ali. I was a corollary target well briefed about where and how to deploy my troop in the soft target under attack so as not to be a fixed site for incoming aircraft. There was a good chance of diverting ordnance to a site made up to receive decoy fire. That way I could both continue in living capacity and distort BDA, Bomb Damage Assessment at their noon briefings.

The main reason I am communicating today in the living mode is that there is a meantime between failure rate where overground feeding was briefly viable. A possible favorable survival ratio can be derived from the enemy's stated aim of preserving culture so as not to annihilate treasure localities, such as Ur or Nineveh or the tomb of Ali. I stayed close to Ur-ground for the greater duration of several raids.

But eventually my position on the receiving end of kinetic- energy penetrators was compromised. During a night exercise while engaged in search of waste disposal I was apprehended by a unit engaged in infrared recognition. I came out of the terrain unaware of the violence processing in progress and was apprehended in situ before I could restore my regulation clothing. I was not immediately counted either a kill or a POW, subject to debriefing and review.

During the time near Nineveh at Ur-ground zero I received both light, moderate and heavy fire and saw light, moderate and heavy casualties in my next of kin, including my nearest kin: mate and spawn. I will likely be denied access to any further information that might jeopardize my position.

In conclusion, I am eyewitness proof of the efficient sorties of the Allies who did not fail to engage their target. Im'shallah, Ali out.

Poet Andrei Codrescu teaches English at Louisiana State University.

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