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Pyatt: Still betting on a Senior Army final of Biden vs. Trump

Dave Pyatt
Dave Pyatt (BSMG)

If I needed help with my income taxes or needed a coherent explanation of why the polar ice caps are melting and its effect on climate change, I probably wouldn’t get in touch with Joe Biden — or any candidate running for president, save for Mayor “Pete” Buttigieg — for an answer. But if I wanted to restore world sanity, I probably would contact Joe first.

This column was partially inspired by a recent “Pickles” cartoon strip in which Earl is responding to a letter in which a doctor wrote that we shouldn’t live past 75 and we are creating an army of old people diminishing the opportunities for young people. Earl asks where he can enlist in this army.

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Ironically, we live in a world today where septuagenarians are both the yin and the yang. Angela Merkel (although not quite a member at a modest 64) has some shakiness in public appearances. As a PFC in this new army, I tip my hat to “General” Trump who has displayed unbridled energy and enthusiasm to change the course of history. He wants to add new feathers to his considerable bonnet. He has a horrible diet like a lot of us putting on a few unwanted pounds and obviously is a considerable challenge to his tailor — who still makes him look presentable after a weight gain probably just south of a hundred pounds since he took office.

As if that’s not enough, he still keeps his libido strong — very, very strong — and a smile on his face despite historically well-armed media coverage.

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“General” Biden on the other hand must fend off 20 or so pesky “young people” who want to negate or diminish the accomplishments of his roughly 40-plus-year political career and dredge up past sins committed when Google didn’t even exist. He may have tried to toss a dollar across the Potomac; who knew? There were rumors he chopped down a cherry tree on the Tidal Basin. I have to admit that he wasn’t at his best during the one and only debate, but in the “Senior Army” he still looks pretty good. Some hints at “work done” perhaps.

I’m still betting on a “General” Biden vs. a “General” Trump final, but there’s a lot of time to go. And it’s still unclear whether a fresh face will emerge. Preliminary polling indicates that only a “general” can defeat Trump. And this leads to a dilemma — as I think it should — within the Democratic Party.

While I enjoy my new “Army” status, and I think it’s important to show the world that the United States is a responsible world player, the political divides among us really concern me.

The downside of folks of such elder stature trying to dominate the world stage is that rabbit holes abound, and candidates and the media get wrapped around these to gin up interest into an essentially dull — or at least shouldn’t yet be prominent on our radar screens — election. It’s still almost a year-and-a-half away. Do we really want to review our busing policy of 30 or 40 years ago? The upside is that only folks of a certain age understand that leadership is about keeping an eye on the big picture, but also having enough sense to know what the big picture is all about. Thank goodness we have Fox News to keep us all straight.

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At the national level the country is de facto broke — nobody wants to address that — and China is reconsidering whether to loan us money. This could be part of “General” Trump’s trade war. In Mandarin, the symbol for danger and opportunity is identical. I’m very disappointed in that our next generation of political leaders can’t grasp this. Yet I see this quality in Republican Gov. Larry Hogan, who undoubtedly will take some heat for not spending all of the Democratic-controlled legislature’s agenda.

But it’s probably the fiscally responsible thing to do. Hogan never served as an elected official prior to his governorship —although he comes from a political “family” — and perhaps that’s a good thing. Politics was never intended to be a livelihood by our founding fathers, but to many it is a career choice. They’re supposed to have a “day job.”

Too many of the current candidates are just throwing out a line into the waters, have preciously little to offer, hope to “raise” money for their ego trips and watch too much TV news. I must confess a “soft spot” for Mayor Pete and his intellect, courage and honesty. It’s just not clear if he has enough experience. I think Biden somehow has to figure out how to put Megan Rapinoe — Secretary of State? — into the picture. Maybe a slight hair recoloring might be in order.

Perhaps only a Category 5 narcissist can capture the moment.

Dave Pyatt writes from Mount Airy.

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