Man, I've got wrestling on the brain. I must've fallen asleep on the couch last night and I had this crazy dream where a whole bunch of WWE Legends from the 1980s were on Smackdown, and they even booked a ridiculous main event where Sheamus and "Mean" Gene Okerlund teamed up to beat Daniel Bryan and Alberto Del Rio. Ridiculous right?

I mean, ... wait. What? You mean that really was an episode of this week's Smackdown? They did a live show and wasted it on that hot garbage? Oh boy.

All kidding aside, I really wish last night's "Super" Smackdown: Blast from the Past was a bad dream. I've been working on a blog about how wrestling and comic books are very similiar. In comic book lingo, I'd like to think that this Smackdown was kind of like a "one-shot" comic. Basically, it's irrelevant in the continuity of the storylines, and if you don't read/watch it, you didn't really miss anything.

Unfortunately, that's not entirely the case. There was a relevant angle between Kane and Randy Orton, and the Piper's Pit with Daniel Bryan and AJ kind of advanced their angle. But don't worry, if you don't watch this episode, I'm sure they'll recap both of those for you. Otherwise, Smackdown was pretty pointless.

Let's do this review chronologically, shall we?

Okerlund opened the show, which was cool, and introduced Sheamus, to a generally positive reaction. Then Gene-o kind of stepped to the side and let Sheamus talk. Don't you want to at least ask him a question Mean Gene? I really wanted Sheamus to open with "Let me tell ya somethin' Mean Gene," a la Hulk Hogan, but I guess we already got our Hogan reference for the year with the Three Stooges/Will Sasso thing on Raw.

The Great White apologized to referee Chad Patton for kicking him in the face last week when he lost his cool. He then apologized to all the officials and the fans. Cue John Laurinaitis, who asked him to do everything he just did by his own accord, because Laurinaitis didn't hear it. After that rigamaroll, Laurinaitis said that wasn't good enough and that he was fining Sheamus $500,000. Ouch. Then he put him in a match against Daniel Bryan and Alberto Del Rio with Mean Gene as his tag team partner.

Laurinaitis is like the Roger Goodell of the WWE, handing out fines and punishing guys for things that have always been "part of the game." (No, you shouldn't be putting your hands on or attacking officials, but we've seen it happen a hundred times in WWE in the past, so he doles out a huge fine the first time someone offends under his regime to make an example out of them.) Making Sheamus repeat the apology was interesting. Sheamus was sincere the first time, but got annoyed when Laurinaitis had him do it again. I was waiting for "Big Johnny" to say he didn't find Sheamus' apology sincere, because it usually isn't when someone makes you do it. I wish Mean Gene would've conducted an interview instead of just standing there, but whatever. ...

Randy Orton was shown getting ready for his match with Mark Henry, and his dad "Cowboy" Bob Orton showed up and said to be careful. ~foreshadowing~

Orton-Henry was actually pretty good. They have good chemistry in the ring. We didn't get a finish though because after Henry and Orton brawled outside the ring, Kane appeared on the TitanTron, having attacked his dad, sending the Viper scurrying for the back. He eventually found his dad, and Kane attacked Randy with a lead pipe, then said some cheesy line about family reunions. The match, I assume, was a no contest, although I would've counted out Orton and awarded it to Henry to give him some momentum heading into his WWE Championship match next week.

So Kane-Orton is going to continue, I assume with some sort of "extreme" match at Extreme Rules, where they can hit each other with lead pipes, etc. This was one of the rare good uses of a Legend on this Blast from the Past show, although I'd argue that you could've had Cowboy Bob show up on any episode of Smackdown and it wouldn't have seemed too out of place. ...

Ryback squashed another jobber. The jobber got mic time again and there were people watching backstage on a monitor (all Legends this time instead of the bottom of the roster) which leads me to believe we're going to have a 1-2-3 Kid moment at some point.

For those unfamiliar, the Kid is better known as Syxx, X-Pac or his real name, Sean Waltman. In the early days of Raw, he regularly appeared as a jobber. Then one night, during a match with Razor Ramon, an established veteran heel, the Kid pulled an upset and pinned him. It was one of those things that really defined Raw at the time. ...

Tyson Kidd, who I guess is a face now, teamed with Heath Slater against the Usos. Slater approached Kidd, who had been teaming with Slater's former partner Justin Gabriel until the high-flyer got hurt, and said he even got them a great manager in Jimmy "Mouth of the South" Hart.

Mick Foley did commentary on this match, and they referenced when he used to do commentary for Smackdown and that he left because of Vince McMahon screaming in his ear. (Detailed in his book, "Countdown to Lockdown.") I guess this was funny because they had Hart keep coming over to the announce table and interrupting Foley by screaming in his megaphone. He eventually chased Hart out of the ring, allowing the Usos to pin Slater and then he gave Hart Socko in the post-match. It was a pretty bad segment overall.

By the way, wasn't something supposed to happen to Booker over the weekend? Laurinaitis said he had a meeting at WWE corporate last week, but nothing ever came of it.

As for the participants in this match, I'm glad Kidd got some TV time and same with the Usos. They have some really nice tandem maneuvers. I keep holding out hope WWE does something with its tag team division. Also, I know lots of people hate Slater, and I get a ton of heat with my friends for this, but I think he's got potential to be a great mid-card heel. He can talk, he bumps well and he just irritates the heck out of people. He compared himself to the Honky Tonk Man on Tuesday. I can kind of see that. ...

Piper's Pit was OK, I guess. I don't like Roddy Piper. That's going to get me some heat too. I just never thought he was that great, probably because I missed his heyday in the mid-1980s. In a nut shell, Piper questioned Daniel Bryan's manhood because he is using AJ as an excuse for losing his World Championship and treated her like crap last week. He tried to talk some sense into AJ, but she still seems to be in love with Bryan. Then Bryan talked some trash about Piper, then slapped him, then ran off. This would come into play later.

The only thing of note here is that Bryan announced that Laurinaitis gave him his rematch against Sheamus, and it's a 2 out of 3 falls match. It's happening at Extreme Rules. I didn't realize "2 out of 3 falls" was "extreme" (well, maybe for WWE). I'm a sucker for 2 out of 3 falls matches, so I'm excited to see this (and it's sort of making up for the 18 seconds at 'Mania right, since now you get to see Sheamus-Bryan wrestle at least two falls?) but so far WWE has announced two matches for Extreme Rules and neither of them are actually being contested under Extreme Rules. Can we just start calling the PPV after WrestleMania "Backlash" again? ...

Khali, Alicia Fox and Natalya (she's a face now?) beat Drew McIntyre and the Bellas when Fox pinned Nikki (I think) after McIntyre ran off saying "I'm better than this." If you are expecting some character development from that, you clearly haven't been watching how they've booked Drew McIntyre. After the match, Mae Young came out, kicked Khali in the shin (which he sold early) and kissed him. It was awful. At least I got to watch Natalya dance around a bit post-match. ...

We had an entire segment that consisted of replays from Raw and a backstage segment with Mean Gene and Sheamus. Nothing to see here. ...

Hacksaw Jim Duggan smacked Hunico with his 2x4 and got disqualified. Sgt. Slaughter came out and put Hunico in a Cobra Clutch. At this point, I really wanted to turn the TV off. ...

Sheamus and Mean Gene beat Del Rio and Bryan. Basically, Del Rio and Bryan beat up Sheamus outside, they tried to bully Mean Gene, which didn't make a lot of sense, so Piper lead the Legends out for a distraction. Del Rio ran off, then Piper got in Bryan's face. He turned around and ate a Brogue kick for the loss. The faces and Legends beat up Ricardo Rodriguez and celebrated. Michael Cole got in the ring, said something stupid, got beat up, then they faded to black. I should've turned the TV off after the Piper's Pit segment. Just awful. ...

In general, the last couple live Smackdowns have been pretty awful. Remember the holiday edition in November? Ugh. These episodes should really be special occasions and a chance to grow the audience, but I have no idea why WWE offers these comedy heavy shows. Is anyone really tuning in to watch this stuff? Sadly, I sat through the whole thing and I'm sure there are some other diehards who did the same. Unfortunately, this isn't the type of programming that appeals to the most loyal fans. I'm not sure it appeals to casual fans either.

I'm just going to pretend it was all a bad dream that never really happened.

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