What happens at Camp David is supposed to stay at Camp David, acknowledges David Simon, the creator of the Baltimore-based TV series "The Wire" and "Homicide: Life on the Street."
But a little "humble-brag" couldn't hurt.
On Jan. 27, Simon, who was invited to the presidential vacation site by the U.S. Housing and Urban Development secretary after Simon's recent work on the HBO miniseries “Show Me a Hero,” wrote a witty account of his recent visit on his website.
“It will have to suffice as humble-brag to say that I drank a couple shots of presidential Jose Cuervo and I played a game of presidential darts and tilted a presidential pinball machine in the game room. Then I threw a couple jumpshots into the hole on either end of the presidential ball court, then powered my way down the lane past an imaginary presidential defender for a graceful lay-up,” wrote Simon, a former Baltimore Sun reporter.
And his presidential adventures didn’t stop there.
He went bowling at Camp David, earning a score of 118 — a small feat compared to President Barack Obama’s score, which Simon said is documented by a photo in the presidential alley.
“In between every other mess with which he’s contending, Barack Obama came here to the presidential retreat one day and rolled a 213,” Simon wrote on his website. “Two thirteen! The man is a beast.”
Simon later joked about stealing a presidential cocktail shaker from the bar at Camp David and holding it for ransom in exchange for a bowling duel with the president.
“So that’s where it stands, Mr. President," Simon wrote. "You want this martini shaker back, you’re gonna roll me ten frames for it, double or nothing. And, to keep it fair, I’ll need a 70-pin spot."
In an email to The Baltimore Sun, Simon said he could say no more without violating his confidentiality agreement (he said his post alone, though comical, was borderline), but confirmed that he was just joking about the stolen shaker. He actually purchased it from the Camp David gift shop for $32.
The White House did not respond to email requests late last week for comment on a possible bowling match with Obama, but until then, Simon, remember — practice makes perfect.