Turns out your mom was right all along -- it's not you, it's them. Or, more specifically, the lack of them.
The ratio of women to men in Baltimore is hopelessly-skewed to the hairy, beer-swilling, leaving-dirty-socks-on-the-bathroom-floor half of the population, according to a special report in Cosmopolitan's November issue.
Charm City ranks as the fourth worst city to meet a man, due to an overabundance of never-married women, according to the magazine. Maybe it's all the ladies who make the city so charming?
Well, that's cool, you say, I'll just spend the weekends in a nearby city and meet guys there. Like, um, D.C.
Sorry ladies, D.C. is the third worst city to meet guys, and not just because the men wear salmon pants. Philly? Second worst.
OK, OK, I'll spend the weekend in New York. Surely, a city of 8 million people has a few single straight guys to spare.
Wrong again! New York is the absolute worst city to meet a guy, according to Cosmo's analysis. No wonder the girls on "Girls" always date such schlubs.
So what should you do? Cosmo recommends searching through your friends' Facebook friends to hunt for single guys, because, you know, that's not creepy or desperate at all.
Or you could move out West. Cosmo says the whole gender balance is skewed in the opposite direction on the other side of the Appalachians, due to the same magnetic forces that make water swirl down the drain in the opposite direction, or something like that.