In an effort to help her friends find her and bring her back home safely, Olivia has convinced Ian to put her up for auction on the black market.
Of course, Olivia's projected to bring in a huge chunk of money. The woman who can convince POTUS to wage an unnecessary war? Think of the power her future owner could have over Fitz.
I have to admit that I, like many others on my Twitter timeline, was made a little uncomfortable by all of the talk of the "auction block," because of its American slavery connotations. (One woman I follow quipped that this storyline is 5,000 years too early. Heh.) But then again, our collective discomfort with the idea of Olivia selling herself to the highest bidder is the point. It shows how far she is willing to go to get back home, the depths she is willing to plumb in order to manipulate her captors. It's also a stark reminder that, under pressure, Olivia is so brilliant that it's almost terrifying.
Ian, for his part, has begun to treat her kind of...well? In addition to gussying her up for potential buyers, he's demanding that his employees (is that what you'd call them?) treat her with some modicum of respect. Would you kick a goose that is in the midst of laying a golden egg? Didn't think so.
Ian also has officially dumped Andrew as his business partner. He's thinking in dollars and he doesn't care a bit about the VPOTUS's political agenda.
On the whole, this is not a good week for Andrew, on the whole. After learning that Andrew is behind both Olivia's kidnapping AND blackmailing Fitz, Cyrus is livid. First, he brings in Fitz's Navy SEAL buddies to replace the disloyal Secret Service. Then he demands that Andrew resign from office. If he refuses to do so, Cyrus threatens to turn him in for treason.
Fitz is past arguing with Andrew. Now, he's intent on rescuing Olivia. He decides to bid on her. "Who has more money than the United States?" he asks Mellie and Cyrus. "Um, China...the UAE…" they deadpan. But Fitz poo-poos those doubts and decides to press on with his plan.
He also decides to bring Jake, Huck and Quinn into the fold. Fearful that the U.S. government won't get very far by trying to join a black-market auction, the trio decides to buy her themselves, but with what money? "All I have is student loans. And it doesn't matter how many times you change your identity. Sallie Mae WILL find you," says Quinn.
(Write this down, for posterity: On February 13, 2015, "Scandal's" Quinn Perkins stopped being insufferable for two minutes and said something relatable.)
But Huck saves the day by reminding them that he has billions of dollars -- the money he stole from B613 when Olivia decided to wage war against her father. That was a much simpler time… Now, it's just up to Huck to use some of his computer skills to find the on-line auction.
Wars with her father, finding out her long-dead mother is very much alive and very much a terrorist, her stupid love triangle with Jake and Fitz -- Olivia probably thought that each of these trials was the worst moment of her life. If she just survived those, maybe "Vermont" or "The Sun" would start being more than stupid catch phrases.What she was not prepared for was being kidnapped by a band of money-hungry terrorists.
Ian doesn't seem so bad now. He repeatedly makes his subordinates treat Olivia well and there seems to be some sort of mutual respect between him and Liv. Unfortunately, it doesn't last long, because his psychopathic employee, Gus, decides that he would rather be in charge and unceremoniously shoots Ian in the head. Brains and blood spew everywhere (And all over Olivia's freshly pressed hair. Poor thing.)
While Liv and the other kidnappers are reeling over this turn of events, Gus decides to double-up on awful now that he's the one in charge and begins threatening to sexually assault Olivia. She is able to get him to back down by threatening to bite off the thumb he brushes against her lips (and anything else he should try to put near her mouth), but this turn of events is still anything but good.
Back in Washington, Andrew has decided to stand his ground. He won't resign and should Cyrus or anyone else try to have him arrested, he will make it known that Fitz went to war in order to save his mistress, thereby damning them all.
Over at OPA, they have hit a major roadblock: the auction seems to be invitation-only. The only way to get invited is to have some major terroristic street cred. Who do they know that's an international terrorist? How about Marie "Mama Pope" Wallace?
They bring David Rosen into the fold and visit Mama Pope in jail, but she refuses to help them unless they give her something. She would like to be taken to a medium security prison where she can have cell mates, access to a library, yard time -- you know, amenities.
Of course, David refuses and for a while, and they are at an impasse. But Quinn comes up with a "brilliant" compromise. She convinces David to get Mama Pope a flat-screen TV. It will be mounted on the wall across from her cell and she will be able to hold the remote. (Do not think for a SECOND that Mama Pope won't be able to fashion a weapon out of a TV remote, you guys.)
They are able to come to an agreement and Mama Pope links them up with some terrorist buddy of hers. In order to gain his trust, they must first kill a few of his disloyal goons.
Of course, Huck is up to the task. (In my notes, I called this scene "Huck gets murder-y.") He slaughters the men, dismembering them and covering the room in blood and limbs. When Jake sees it, he make a visible effort not to scream, or even shudder. But we all know that when times get rough, Huck gets brutal. "I have the dental bill to prove it," Quinn later tells Jake.
With Ian in charge, Olivia had a bit of hope. He was evil, but reasonable. Gus, on the other hand, is unpredictable. I believe the word his men used to describe him is "psychotic."
Hoping to stage a coup against him, Olivia tries convincing Gus's new underlings to betray him. If they help her, she promises that she will make sure they don't serve any jail time for this and to connect them with rich and powerful people who will help them accomplish all of their dreams.
Unfortunately for Liv, one of her kidnappers says the only thing he dreamed of growing up a poor kid, dependent on school meals for food, was a billion dollars. They are going to take their chances with Gus.
All of Olivia's friends, lovers and a couple of her past enemies are involved in this rescue mission, except for Abby. During a one-on-one briefing with Fitz, Abby temporarily eschews professionalism and asks him if he's heard from Liv. She's notoriously bad at returning phone calls, but Abby has never gone this long without hearing from her.
Fitz softens and decides to tell Abby the truth, which leads to her storming into David's office to demand an explanation. If he knew that her best friend -- her only friend -- had been kidnapped, then why wouldn't he tell her?
At first, David is callous and dismissive, basically telling Abby that she needs a higher security clearance in order to demand to know things like that. Of course, Abby balks at this; eventually, she and David are able to talk civilly. He even tell her that, despite their past, she has a friend in him.
Unfortunately, Mellie isn't able to get along as well with her ex.
Andrew pretends to confide in her about his fears of prison and his refusal to resign, but soon he drops all pretense and flat out threatens to tell the world about their affair. (Someone should really warn Andrew about threatening the wrong people. Cyrus AND Mellie in one episode? The guy is doomed.)
The threat leaves her shaken because, as she tells Fitz later in the episode, she's got her eye on the Oval Office. (Would SO vote for Mellie, tbh.)
Now that Andrew has threatened both Mellie and Cyrus, Fitz comes up with a solution. If Andrew tries to accuse Fitz of waging a war in order to save his mistress, Fitz will push back and say that he went to war because terrorists from West Angola made an attempt on the VPOTUS's life. Then, everyone will find out that Andrew faked that bombing, further damning him.
Soon after that little bright moment, the team gets some bad news. The auction has ended early. Olivia has been sold. They wrack their brains, trying to figure out who she could have been sold to, which leads to Huck freaking out and saying that Olivia will be tortured and killed. His ranting earns him a slap from Quinn, but in the end, he's right to despair just a bit.
According to Gus, Olivia was bought by Iran.
Here's hoping that Rowan is behind all of this. I'm tired of Olivia being held hostage and I miss his monologues.