Imagine the trauma involved when you take one of the most sadistic groups of human beings and put them in the most evil place on earth.
The Gang visited the Jersey Shore this week. Please, allow me to digress: As a Towson alum who was born in Philadelphia, I have an eternal bias against all things Jersey. While the regular "Jersey Shore" cast is plaguing Italy, the Paddy's gang visits the east coast's armpit.
This week's "Sunny" was much truer to the form fans missed in last week's C+ premiere. There were memorable moments, risks in the plot and a moment that made you stop, rewind and think "Did they just take [insert drug here]?"
BEST INVENTION EVER: Rum Ham — think back to college, when freshmen girls would fill a watermelon with vodka and then eat it. Now replace the watermelon with a succulent ham, and the vodka with rum.
HEART WARMING MOMENT: We were graced by The Waitress for the first time this season. And she was unusually kind and warm toward Charlie? Remember the awkward "Star Wars" poster where Lea is grasping Luke's inner thigh? You get that same feeling when watching The Waitress gently clench Charlie's shoulder as they watch fireworks on the beach.
It's revealed the next morning that she was on ecstasy. (Quick reminder: she is a recovering alcoholic.)
WORST USE OF A HEAVILY TAXED PRODUCT: After being marooned out to sea, Mac and Frank were rescued by a yacht full of partying guidos. Amidst the fist-pumping, iron-pumping and steroid-shooting, the two fattest characters on the show were given spray tans. #FatFail
FUNNIEST MOMENT OF TRAUMA FOR SWEET DEE: Why does bad stuff usually happen to Dee Reynolds? Because it's hilarious. Dee, who found it appropriate to sport White-Girl-Dreads, had a chunk violently ripped out on a boardwalk ride.
DID THEY JUST TAKE A HIT OF ... ANGEL DUST?: Dee and Denis, who were trying to party with boardwalk people, hit some chronic by accident. NBD, right? Until the best montage since "Rocky IV" ensued. Apparently this group of boardwalkers rob liquor stores with 12-Gauges, and force the Reynolds siblings to assist in their getaway and bury a corpse on the beach.