'Glee' recap: 'Old Dog, New Tricks'

Kurt (Chris Colfer) nabs the lead role in a retirement home production of "Peter Pan."
Kurt (Chris Colfer) nabs the lead role in a retirement home production of "Peter Pan."(Tyler Golden/Fox)

Before you delve too far into this recap, you should know that the most exciting thing to happen tonight on "Glee" is that Santana is a blond.

Beyond that, it was cute, but nothing substantial happened. I guess they're saving all the big juice for next week's season finale ... and juicy is definitely the word I'd use for next week based solely upon the preview!


Tonight starts with Rachel finding out that she has a blind item about her. For those of you who don't know what a blind item is, it's when folks can send in anonymous tips about celebrities and -- without using said celebrities' names -- say basically anything it is that you want to get off your chest about them.

Think they're having an affair on their loved ones? Put it out there. Heard they're evading taxes? Let 'er rip. It's basically just another way to remain anonymous while you say whatever it is you want to say about a specific person, truth or otherwise.

The blind item talks about how a certain Broadway newcomer would rather call out of work and fly to California for other auditions than play the role she was lucky enough to get. Santana makes Rachel realize that she needs a cause to brighten up her image so Rachel decides that she's going to spring for animals' rights.

Together, Santana and Rachel come up with Broadway Bitches, a charity that aids in helping shelter dogs find forever homes. While visiting the shelter the group belts out "I Melt With You" and Sam falls in love with a dog he named McConaughey. Yes, like Matthew.

When he brings the dog home behind Mercedes' back and she walks into a trashed brownstone, she looks like she wants to tell Sam that they can't keep the dog. Sam uses his charm to persuade her otherwise ... until the dog comes running down the stairs with a piece of her weave. Oops.

When Mercedes tells him he's got to get rid of the dog he decides that if he has the dog trained and groomed by the time Mercedes gets back she'll have to let him keep it! During a montage to the song "Werewolves of London,"

Artie and Sam train the dog and have him all cleaned up and ready to impress Mercedes. Unfortunately, she stays true to her word and convinces Sam that they need to find the dog a new home. She'll be going on tour soon and his schedule isn't going to get easier, it's not that she doesn't trust Sam it's just that McConoughey deserves better.

Rachel's situation doesn't get better at her event. Santana takes on the role of Rachel's publicist and finds a three-legged-dog that will be perfect for a photo-op for her when  Broadway World comes to check out the event. But when someone comes along and wants to adopt it, Rachel's true colors shine through when she says they can't have the dog until after she gets her picture taken.


The woman retorts that she bets Rachel doesn't care about anything but herself. This happens to be true, as we all know very well. Kurt had gotten involved with a senior citizen production of "Peter Pan" and when he asked for his friend to support him, Rachel was too busy faking her passion for the animals to care.

Kurt had met Maggie Banks, a sweet old lady (with a beautifully husky alto voice) who starred in "Helen Keller: The Musical" back in the day. Needless to say, it didn't go very well, and that was Maggie's career.

We find out that Maggie has an estranged daughter named Claire, who Maggie pretends to have a strong relationship, even going as far as sending herself flowers on a weekly basis to keep up the front. When Kurt goes to visit Claire, he finds out that Claire is keeping her distance to protect herself from the mother that was too ambitious seeking a career to pick her up from school or attend her graduation.

I do love Kurt and Maggie's relationship, it's very sweet! They sing a beautiful rendition of "Memories" from "Cats" and then during the updated version of "Peter Pan," they lead a fun rendition of "Lucky Star."

Present at the show are all of Kurt's friends and Claire! Rachel wants to do something REALLY right and asks that all of the senior citizens join them at the diner to perform "Take Me Home Tonight" as they help dogs find forever homes.

Cute episode but get me to that finale! Didn't see the commercial? Check it out here. Make sure you're here this time next week for the last Glee blog of the season!