I've slept on it and I still have no idea who's going home tonight. The show makes a big deal all over again about Noah Galloway's proposal to his girlfriend. I think they've been dating forever, haven't they? I'm also not a fan of big public proposals. But mazel tov to those crazy kids - may they have many happy years together.
They show a brief clip package of Noah Galloway and Sharna Burgess last night and show the marriage proposal for the second time in the last 10 minutes. Good Lord. How many other couples got engaged yesterday? It's not like he cured cancer on live television.
Their results are in and Noah & Sharna are in jeopardy.
Now some moppet with a guitar is sitting on a front porch on the stage singing "The Summer of '69," which segues into "R.O.C.K. in the USA." Because AMERICA. There's a lot of denim. Wonder if any of it was manufactured in this country? Even after the routine ends, Tom Bergeron doesn't enlighten us as to the identity of the moppet.
Erin Andrews does a very long interview segment with the four pros left in the competition. Nobody says anything particularly exciting or enlightening. So, your basic sideline report.
Now it's time for the clip package for Riker Lynch & Allison Holker. They had perfect scores on both routines last night. Since Riker's not competing tonight, Allison's letting him sport his dumb hair. They're announced as finalists!
Now for a fun gimmicky routine - Emma Slater and Sasha Farber take us through 100 years of dance in under two minutes. It's a pre-recorded bit because there's no way they could change costumes so many times on live television.
Now up for some results: Nastia Liukin and Derek Hough/Sasha Farber. I'm getting choked up all over again with the footage of Len Goodman. Nastia & Derek are in jeopardy, and the crowd boos.
The female pros are gathered together for a group routine. It's very girl power with a lot of special effects. That's the second number tonight choreographed by Mandy Moore. She's staying busy in the So You Think You Can Dance off-season.
The pros do the "critique the competitors" montage. Rumer's too hard on herself, Noah needs to up his performance quality. Val says of Nastia that she's so perfect it's "uninteresting." I yell, "That's exactly what I've been saying." My dad says to my mom, "That's what people are always saying about me - right, dear?" She automatically says, "Yes, dear." Forty-seven years of marriage, y'all.
Rumer Willis & Val Chermkovskiy get their results and are in jeopardy. C'mon, show. It's lame to put three out of four couples into jeopardy, all drawn out like this.
The "look back over the season" montage has the gimmick of showing on the screen the loglines producers put on the rehearsal and behind-the-scenes footage.
Riker's brother Ross Lynch and the cast of "Teen Beach 2" perform. I'm too old to get it but the kids seem to have energy. Oh, youth.
Finally, we get the rest of the results. Now I'm remembering how excruciating these results shows could be -- 57 minutes of build-up for three minutes of actual show. The next couple announced as finalists are Noah & Sharna. Oh, c'mon, please please please let Rumer be the other finalist.
So it's down to Nastia & Derek or Rumer & Val. Rumer & Val had the lower judges' scores - did they capture enough viewer votes to make up the difference? They did! Not that I'm anti-Nastia, but I really wanted Rumer to get through to the finals.
Well, I think it's Noah's to lose unless he blows it in such a way the judges have to score him way lower than the others. And that might still not do it.