On weekday mornings, I'll post the most controversial, shocking and (of course) ridiculous stories for your reading pleasure. That way, when you walk into work, you'll be the master of witty conversation.

National 

• Dead celebrities eligible to vote in New York. (NY Post) 

• Why are there so many crazy people? Bloody pig's foot sent to U.S. Rep. Peter King. (CBS News) 

• We love transparency: Huckabee's records missing. (Mother Jones) 

• We love transparency, Pat II: No civilian trials for Gitmo suspects. (LAT) 

• GOP budget would cut $5.8 trillion. Yes, that's trillion. (Reuters) 

• News flash: Most Twitter users have a life -- 68 percent of Twitter accounts are not used. (Gawker) 

Local

• Irony: Power reliability press conference features power outage. (Baltimore Sun) 

• Mayor: We're not paying lead paint court judgments against us. (Baltimore Sun) 

• PG County schools owe foreign teachers millions. (AP) 

• Rolley's campaign office opening in Hampden. (Explore Baltimore County) 

Video (No comments needed)  

• Sarah Silverman says Obama wants her to send him a naked video 

• Mika can't stop laughing at Letterman's Cheney bit: 

• "The Governator" trailor: