Anyway, SFSM, men who wear bras, panties, and stockings—I have heard of that before, yes. Bras, panties, and stockings are things that some men enjoy. But I once got pulled aside at a party by a butch dyke who confided in me that she likes to wear lacy/girly bras and panties under her Carhartt pants and flannel shirts. She too wanted to know if I had ever heard of someone like her before—a woman who essentially cross-dressed by wearing women's underwear—and I had to tell her that I hadn't. But that butch dyke enjoys wearing bras, panties, and stockings for the exact same reason you and many other straight guys do: the frisson of transgression, the thrill of having a sexy secret, the reveal to a new partner. She didn't seem particularly conflicted about her non-butch-dyke-normative tastes—heck, she seemed rather pleased with herself. You should consider her a role model, SFSM, and follow her example.