Nothing says winter magic like the moment the 2015 tent catalogs appear! 2014 models are on sale, and we are treated to a glimpse of what 2016 might hold for advances in the tent tech sector. Whether you do your tent shopping online or at the graveyard store, I have a few suggestions to smooth the kinks out of even the savviest little duckling’s tent-acquisition process.
Note: I'm typing this with the wide end of last night's chopstick.
4. Changing tents at the beach: Is that still a thing?
6. At this point in your research, do some stretches. The word "tent" is derived from the Latin tendere, "to stretch," except maybe it didn't actually mean "stretch" specifically, since the word "stretch" is from the Old English streccan and my cursory knowledge of generally everything tells me that Latin is way older than even the oldest of Old English. The key thing to remember here is that five thousand years ago, native Latin speakers didn't need a word for "stretch" because they had tendere and they knew what that meant.
8. Jakpak.com: Navigate the police state in comfort with this parka that deploys into a body bag. Cleverly labeled as a tent.
9. Take an extra 40 percent off: Of what? Any old thing, really. Head on out there into the world and take nearly half off of whatever you want. This offer expires never.
