Devastated In Denver
You could've saved face in the moment by laughing and saying something like this: "Yeah, I was quite the little pervert back then, bro, but weren't we all at that age?" Your parents, your new wife, your brother's son, et al. would've imagined your brother doing something much, much worse than wearing women's clothes. But it's too late for that comeback. (Avoir l'esprit de l'escalier, right?) So my advice now: Pick a special, solemn occasion-your brother's anniversary party, midnight mass, his son's graduation-and show up in full fuckin' drag.
I'm a 33-year-old lesbian. A year ago, my partner and I split up for five months. During that time, I dated a girl while my partner engaged in multiple sexual relationships-all with men. We ended up getting back together. One problem keeps me from moving on: I am the only woman my partner has ever been with, and I can't stop thinking about the fact that she spent so much "quality time" with so many men while we were apart. I can't help but wonder if she's bi or straight! It also hurts that she feels like she can't be honest with me about what she likes or wants or needs sexually. I should mention that we are a little over a year into our "new" relationship and we never have sex. I initiated sex a week ago-the first time we've had sex in four months!-and she came, I didn't, and she didn't care. Any time I try to talk to her about it, she gets defensive and tells me that she is attracted to me and insists she doesn't like sex with guys. What do I do, Dan?