Get the rotten eggs ready. A woman in North Dakota apparently plans to hand out, in lieu of treats, you're-too-fat-for-candy letters to select children on Halloween. I'm a mom who does ration Halloween candy and tries to serve her family healthy foods, but this makes me sick.

Yeah, the fat kid probably doesn't need more candy. Is it your job to tell him? Maybe you shouldn't wear those pants because they make your butt look saggy; is it my job to tell you? You know, if you took up jogging, you might lose that pooch I've noticed you're developing. Also, Rogaine really is magical for hairlines, have you heard? And Botox can work wonders on your pesky wrinkles!

Get a clue. And get ready for some major tricks.