You were probably expecting a Top 10 on, oh, I don't know, great go-withs for turkey on the Tuesday before Thanksgiving.
Instead I'm giving you bacon spinoffs. Thanks to David W., Bob and ryan97ou for nominations and contributions to this list.
And now, without further ado, here are the Top 10 Weird Bacon Products: ...
* What made me decide to do this Top 10 was the bacon soap post. Enough said.
*Cook down bacon, onions and spices and what do you get? Bacon jam. Not sure what you'd do with it but put it on burgers. At $17 for 8 ounces, it must be the most expensive burger condiment in the world.
* First there was bacon salt. And then baconnaise. Now the same company brings us Bacon Pop, bacon-flavored popcorn, three boxes for $12. Well, it's not a taste you'll be able to duplicate at the movie theater.
* Only Bacon Balm, bacon-flavored lip balm, would come with a warning that while your lips smell like bacon, they aren't bacon, so don't bite your lips.
* Bacon-Flavored Toothpicks. The concept is awesome: If you do eat bacon, you can pick it out of your teeth afterwards with bacon-flavored toothpicks. A box of 80 costs $4.99.
* Here's something to make your spirit bright around the holidays: BLT Votive Candles. I'm a little skeptical about the ones scented with lettuce and tomato, but about the bacon candle there can be no doubt. It will smell like bacon. Three candles for $33.95.
* I'm not saying the products (gourmet bacon) are weird in this one. It's just weird that anyone would buy the Bacon of the Month Club for $99 (three months) or $180 (six months).
* I personally don't like the taste of envelope glue. But I don't think I want it to taste like bacon either. However, if you feel differently, there's J&D's Bacon-Flavored Mmmvelopes. Pack of 25 for $6.95.
* Here's another one I've highlighted on Dining@Large before: bacon floss. You can't expect me to come with 10 brand new bacon spinoffs, can you?
* Apparently, or so Gailor tells me, bacon ice cream is something everyone knows about but me. When I Binged it, I came up with this bacon ice cream post on the Freakonomics blog, which is well worth taking a look at.