So, tonight, Dancing With the Stars gets started right away with Lil' Kim and Derek Hough dancing the jive again. ("Jailhouse Rock"! Hee! And, thankfully, no costume issues tonight that I can see.) If only the results would come so quickly ...
We're reminded of the standings -- cute-as-a-button Ty Murray and Chelsie Hightower on the bottom, along with Steve-O and Lacey Schwimmer. They laugh about the fact that Steve-O did what he thought was his best dance, but he got one 4. Chuck Wicks and Julianne Hough comment on their raunchy rumba (I agreed with judge Len Goodman on that one -- ick). And so on and so forth ...
Next up ... musical theater! Some of the cast of the Broadway revival of West Side Story perform "America." How does their sound carry? I don't see any microphones.
Samantha Harris asks Kim about what it's like being the first to knock Gilles Marini out of the top spot. She says she feels good but isn't taking anything for granted. Samantha then asks Melissa Rycroft about the group dance, which she'll participate in next week if she's not kicked off tonight. She says it will be fun and be nice to dance without pressure. (Oh, man, the group dance is so cheesy.) Ty says he didn't do his best dancing last night (thus 6s instead of 9s). Samantha asks Steve-O if he thinks he'll be saved by his fans again despite his low marks. He says he's just thankful for the experience, or something to that extent.
Host Tom Bergeron makes an interesting note: Steve-O's 4 was the lowest mark given in this week in the history of the competition.
After a brief recap of the scores, Kim and Derek and Lawrence Taylor and Edyta Sliwinska are asked to step down to the center of the stage. K&D are safe (no surprise), and so are L&E.
Rascal Flatts is now performing "Goodbye" from their new album, Unstoppable. My TV-watching partner-in-crime and I proceed to have a discussion about how reality TV is unstoppable. Julianne and Tony Dovolani dance along.
There's now a clip about the costumes; the stars will be "designing" the costumes next week instead of the pros. Some of the ideas: show skin (Gilles), show less skin (Lawrence), leotardlike (Shawn Johnson), leopard (Steve-O), denim (Ty).
More results: Shawn and Mark Ballas are safe; so are Melissa and Tony.
After more interview time with Samantha (this time about costumes: "As long as she doesn't give me her pasties, I'm fine," Derek says of Lil' Kim.), we get more results ... oh, I got ahead of myself. We have a Macy's Stars of Dance performance choreographed by original Pussycat Doll Lindsay Allen and featuring Carmen Electra. Oh, goody. They (they being Carmen and dancers I've never seen) dance to "Stuff Like That There."
Rascal Flatts (yes, again) perform the Beatles' "Revolution."
Karina SmirnoffAliona Vilani, dressed in a military outfit, and Chelsie, dressed in silver and black, dance, Aliona with Artem Chigvintsev and Chelsie with Mark Ballas. They had partners, but I couldn't tell whom they were. Can anyone help me out? (Edited to add: Thanks for the help, commenters!)
Now an expert talks about body language? Really? Please give me the results. Please. Shawn's shrugging means she's insecure. Ty holds on to Chelsie for security. Melissa is fearful. Gilles is humble. Samantha finds this segment funny.
And finally ... Gilles and Cheryl Burke are safe. We find out the fate of the others after a break, but first we get a weird musical cue, and the commercials don't come in soon enough. We hear Tom say, "Well, that was abrupt!" Clearly he didn't know he was on TV. Funny!
The next couple safe is Chuck and Julianne. There is no dance off tonight for Lacey and Steve-O and Ty and Chelsie. Judge Carrie Ann Inaba says they'll lose his graceful determination. Len says they'll lose Ty's charm. Bruno Tonlioli says Ty should be back.
And he is. Steve-O is dunzo. He says he met a lot of challenges and made a lot of mistakes. He grew as a person, and is thankful for his fans. He says Lacey was patient with him, and that he tended to "manstruate." Steve-O leaves us laughing!