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First, my apologies to all of you who thought this was going to be an Oscar Salazar update. This morning's first subject -- since I haven't gotten to the ballpark yet -- is related to the Academy Awards show last night and my opinion that Sean Penn and O's catcher Gregg Zaun were separated at birth.

Orioles and Oscar
Orioles and Oscar

I know the resemblance is sketchy, and I'm pretty sure Zaun isn't likely to start lecturing everyone in the clubhouse who is opposed to gay marriage about how ashamed their grandchildren are going to be of them, but I thought I'd let you join in a fun little game we play in the press room once in awhile and ask you to pick the cast for a movie about the Orioles.

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If Penn would play Zaun, who would play Aubrey Huff? Melvin Mora? Brian Roberts? Nick Markakis? Adam Jones?

Bonus Oscar rant: I'm not commenting on the gay marriage issue here one way or the other. I'm just tired of being lectured on politics and ethics by Hollywood, though I appreciate Penn taking time out from punching photographers to let us know how he feels about peace, love and understanding. I also found it funny that in the same Oscar speech, this year's Best Actor condescendingly condemned opponents of gay marriage and talked about how happy he was to finally have an "elegant" new president, forgetting -- apparently -- that Barack Obama and vice president Joe Biden said repeatedly during the campaign that they are personally opposed to gay marriage.

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