While I was trolling the internet this morning I came upon an AOL headline that read "Shortest man meets leggiest woman," which would get anyone's attention. Take a look for yourself. It just might change your life.

I was pretty sure my wife was the leggiest woman in the world when I married her, so to find this out all these years later is a little disturbing.

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Chris Waters, whose shutout last night defied science, is scheduled to pitch the final game ever at the old Yankee Stadium on Sunday. Probably against Andy Pettitte. It's not exactly a pitching matchup made in Monument Park, but -- no matter what happens the rest of his career -- Waters will have an amazing memory that no one will ever be able to take away from him.

Streaming Schmuck Consciousness

Maryland's Racing Commission has approved new restrictions on anabolic steroids for thoroughbreds. No word yet on whether the Major League Baseball Players Association will file a grievance.

Just read Rick Maese's column on that nasty hit by Maryland DB Kevin Barnes Saturday. I saw it in person, but felt more queasy after reading Rick. He must be a helluva good writer.

Throw in today's Faceoff, in which Kevin Van Valkenburg (right) channels Jessica Simpson arguing with herself, and I may need to be medicated. I'm really not seeing the resemblance. How about you?

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