And it's almost over -- it's finale night on Dancing With the Stars. (Thank heavens; I love you guys, but I want my evenings back!)
The show starts with a montage from last night, even though they just reaired the whole show at 8 p.m.
Then Usher comes out to dance and sing, followed by predictions from past contestants.
Then, results: The third-place finisher is Cristian de la Fuente, so he and Cheryl Burke are out. I'm actually surprised. I thought if anyone would overcome the scoring gap, it would be him. Before they go, Cristian and Cheryl reprise their paso doble. (HEY!)
Then it's time for some more reprisals. Penn Jillette and Kym Johnson hit the floor to dance again, followed by Monica Seles and Jonathan Roberts. (Monica's having fun, but definitely disproving the idea that athletes have an unfair advantage on this show.) Happy-go-lucky Steve Guttenberg and Anna Trebunskaya return, too, as do Adam Carrolla and Julianne Hough with their paso doble that begins with a unicycle ride.
Next, it's time for results. No, not those results -- the junior champions. And the winners are Brandon and Brittany. They are excited and get a mini mirror-ball trophy and a visit from some of the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders.
Time for more former contestants, the first being Priscilla Presley and Louis van Amstel with the tango.
Then there is a "tribute" to Jason and Cristian's friendship, or bromance, as Cheryl puts it. Host Tom Bergeron says they were going to save it for the wrap party, but they decided to share it with America.
Marlee Matlin and Fabian Sanchez resprise one of their dances, as do Shannon Elizabeth and Derek Hough.
Then Baltimore R&B star Mario and Karina Smirnoff hit the floor with their mambo, followed by Marissa Jaret Winokur and Tony Dovolani with the paso doble.
Usher returns, singing a Broadway version of "Yeah," while dancing with some of the pros and a floor full of other dancers.
Finally, Kristi and Mark and Jason and Edyta come out to reprise their favorite performance of the season and to get their last scores from the judges. (It's yet another show going with a boxing theme tonight, as they play the Rocky theme.)
Kristi and Mark are first, with the jive, the one where Mark wears Buddy Holly glasses. Len says she is the most consistent dancer of all their season. Bruno says she didn't miss a beat. Carrie Ann says these two set the standard through the season, and also grew throughout the season. Tonight and last night's judges' scores will be combined with the votes from last night to determine the winner. Scores: 10-10-10, for another 30/30.
Jason and Edyta revisit their quickstep from earlier in the season, which is a good choice, because it's probably the dance on which he showed the most personality all season. Bruno says "heavenly bodies" is a term created for them. Carrie Ann says it's a showdown tonight, and then she says something about the elegance of his spirit (OK, Paula). Len calls him the people's champion. Scores: 10-10-10, for a 30/30, their first.
To draw things out, Tom talks to the other contestants. Priscilla Presley says it's been a pleasure. Mario says it's been an amazing experience and pure fun. Shannon Elizabeth cries again, saying she is so happy for everyone.
Can we have some results, please??
And the winners are ... Kristi Yamaguchi and Mark Ballas. She graciously thanks everyone behind the show for making this a dream experience, and Mark seconds that. Tom hands them the disco-ball trophy, and the hugs and confetti begin.
How do you feel about the results? After last night, I figured this was the way it would end, and it seems a fitting conclusion.