You can forget about Jaret Wright making the U.S. gymnastics team for the next summer Olympics. He failed to perform a cartwheel after being traded to the Orioles.
He's not miserable, but I think it's pretty clear that he wanted to stay in New York. Not everybody has the stomach for it. Wright does, which is a good sign. He's a tough guy.
Being reunited with pitching coach Leo Mazzone will crank up his enthusiasm. So will the chance to beat the Yankees a few times.
I haven't heard Tom Glavine's name mentioned in the Orioles' plans, and it's highly unlikely that Greg Maddux would want to pitch in the American League East. Ties to Mazzone are only so strong.
The second annual Funniest Sports Celebrity contest takes place tonight at the DC Improv, with the first joke coming at 8 p.m.
If I had accepted an offer to participate, you would have seen the first visible signs of sweating around 8:01 p.m.
Tickets go for $35 and are available at the door or www.dcimprov.com.
Monica Livingston of the DC Divas women's football team will attempt to defend her title. Sports-radio host Anita Marks knows Livingston and says she's "hilarious."
Speaking of Marks, here's hoping that she's feeling a little better this morning after having the ultimate upset stomach last night.
There's nothing quite as disturbing as sharing appetizers with someone and having that person call you about an hour later to say that she's feeling sick and barely made it home. I'm left to wonder when it's going to hit me, too. I cleared a path to the bathroom, just in case.
Unwilling to give into my fears, I grabbed two Kit Kats and a 3 Musketeers out of the Halloween candy bowl, watched back-to-back episodes of Family Guy and went to bed. Now THAT'S tough. That's Jaret Wright tough.
I need to dust off my suit for Saturday's 13th Pediatric Oncology Friends Gala to benefit Johns Hopkins Pediatric Oncology. Money raised will go to the doctors for research to find cures for cancers that afflict children.
The gala will be held at Hillendale Country Club and include music by Fifth Avenue and Second Self, as well as silent and live auctions.
Among the items available is a Hall of Fame baseball collection - 12 individually signed baseballs from 12 Hall of Famers displayed in one case - an autographed Edwin Mulitalo helmet, a signed Ray Lewis jersey, Brian Roberts autographed game-worn spikes and cap, a skate signed by Kimmie Meissner, a Paul Reed Smith guitar, and Daniel Cabrera's baseball, signed by the pitcher, from the final out in his one-hitter at Yankee Stadium, along with the scorecard signed by every Oriole who played in the game.