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Near the end of the long and winding queue of Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey at Universal's Islands of Adventure stands the animatronic Sorting Hat. In the Potter books and films, the Sorting Hat's role was to determine which house to assign incoming Hogwarts students.
In the Forbidden Journey line, its role falls under "gentle safety reminder." Things like don't eat or drink, do stow your belongings and go away if you're queasy-prone.
The animatronic is eye-catching and good. And it's been operating everytime I've taken a Forbidden Journey. So the hat's rhythmic spiel is charming. But imagine the ride going down and being stuck there, so close/so far.
That happened to my friend and frequent Wizarding Worlder Greg, who started typing down the phrases into his iPhone out of boredom I think. I would've guessed there were four verses or so to the lilting cautionary tale, but it's longer than that, as you'll see. Over the weeks, we'd try to verify Greg's work against the hat's words in person. Finally, Greg has declared: close enough.
We won't pretend this is news. Wizaring World of Harry Potter has been open since ( cough)spring(cough), er, June 18. But I've not seen it printed elsewhere, and it might come in handy in a bar bet or something.
What's that you say, Sorting Hat?
Your journey is about to start.
Safely you must go
And so the Hogwarts Sorting Hat
Tells all you need to know.
These benches are not safe for you
If you are still too small.
You must be more than goblin-sized
48 inches tall.
Now rid yourself of objects
That might poke or scratch or fall.
Take jewelry, cell phones or loose change
And stow them one and all.
To keep your treasures safe and sound
Smart lockers are supplied.
Gringotts made them wizard-proofed
For all you need to hide.
Now, a warning:
Do not ride if flying makes you queasy.
If frightened or else sore in back or neck
Then leave. It's easy.
You've come far.
You're very near.
The waiting's been long.
But, smoking, drinking and eating while you ride
Are very wrong.
Now thank you all for listening.
Our safety lesson's done.
We hope you live to tell the tale.
And most of all, have fun.