Tax Day approaches, and Plan Ahead is here to give you great tips on filing.

  • Instead of picking the default return for business clothing, itemize each object for a more hefty return. Example:
    1. leather studded-collar -- $24.95
    2. zebra-striped codpiece -- $55.99
    3. rubber-ball mouth gag -- $27.50
    4. full latex gimp suit with mouth zipper -- $350.00
  • "The Orlando Wastewater Bureau" does not count as a charitable organization no matter how many "donations" you've flushed its way. (Unless, of course, you enclosed it in the proper envelope.)


  • Technically, that flip out you had when you did peyote at the company Christmas party can not be filed as a business "trip." But that flight to Mexico where you picked it up can be.


  • Dollar bills stuffed into strippers' g-strings are deductable as business expenses, but you do need a receipt for each or at least the phone number of the dancer for verification in the case of an audit.


  • When sending in the tax forms, slip a crisp twenty in with it. This will assure you won't get audited. If that doesn't work, slip in the number of that stripper.


  • Now when you get that juicy return, you can thank Plan Ahead for the help.

    Here are some good Music tips:

    Friday
  • megaphone CD release party -- or is it seedy release party?
  • The Kills -- careful with that axe, Eugene
  • King Diamond -- either a pimp or a metal act


  • Saturday
  • OK Go -- what happened to Ready, Set?
  • Fall Out Boy -- radiation-rock therapy
  • The Bamboo Kids -- hollow howlers