From the Cubicle: Cubs-Nationals

Live play-by-play of today's Cubs-Nationals game from a guy completey tired of beach volleyball and the Little League world series. What's next Little League beach baseball?

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After yesterday's excitement, when Carlos Zambrano had a little talk with himself, hit a homer, spit a tooth out and kept on pitching the Cubs to a 3-2 victory over the Cincinnati Reds, today in a word: Blech.

I give you this doozy: Jason Marquis on eight-day's rest against lefty John Lannan (6-12, 3.81), who's 0-3 in his last three starts, but, if you recall, beat the Cubs in D.C. on April 27.

But you know what, kids? It's Friday and that trumps any lousy pitching matchup. Summer is still in effect despite the constant din of these nimrods and meatheads pining for football. It'll be here soon enough for the fantasy football dorks. Back off. The beaches are still open and we've got two pennant races in town and you're wondering about the Bears offense? Lemme tell you something: it sucks. Next. And, yeah, I have fantasies like the next guy but they don't include LaDainian Tomlinson.

I'm here for you. Shut it down. Pretend you're working. Lock the office door. Do anything, but please do not be productive. Time for baseball.

Today's lineups featuring the National's formidable crew of .260 hitters and a Cubs lineup without Jim Edmonds or Kosuke Fukudome, who get the day off against the left-handed Lannan.

Now that I've switched from NBC and that awesome rhythmic gymnastics all-around final, we'll focus on a sport without twirling ribbons.

The Cubs are the only afternoon game today. The weather is muggy. It was raining downtown but now it's not. However, the tarp still is on the field at Wrigley, where it appears to be drizzling. This game will not start on time. We'll keep you posted.

Tom Skilling update: Skililng's on now and he says we should soon be ""playing ball permanently." I'm not sure what that means but the rain is now moving to southern DuPage County.

Paul Sullivan update: Tribune Cubs beat reporter Paul Sullivan says this game won't get underway until at least 2 p.m. C'mon now. The street is dry here. Right. I guess Skilling said the rain was coming from southern DuPage? I don't know. I guess that's where all weather systems start. And honestly, I'm not sure where DuPage County is.

Tarp update: It's coming off. We're looking at a 2:20 p.m. first pitch, according to Len. Here are the lineups that I failed to link to above. Meanwhile, WGN is showing the 8.8.88 first night game. Rick Sutcliffe on the mound throws the first pitch to the immortal Damon Berryhill amid a sea of pre-digital camera flashbulbs. Harry Caray is confused with all the lights and Phil Bradley hits a leadoff homer onto Waveland.

Harry: "Hey, maybe the wind is blowing out."

Steve Stone: "Yes, Harry, the wind is blowing out at 9 mph."

Bill Murray (yelling out of the booth to portly umpire Eric Gregg): "Eric, you look fantastic!"

Phillies 1, Cubs 0

Even though I know the outcome, I fave a feeling this game will be better than today's game.

Donkey named Jack, I grew up in Elmhurst. Any more questions? Actually, I did not, but I've been there many times and of course I know where DuPage County is. OK, this game can't start soon enough. OOh, Ryne Sandberg goes deep to tie the game and there's a guy in the left-field bleachers wearing a sweet Def Leppard-esque Union Jack muscle shirt.

Back to the present, and it's even stranger than the past. There are people milling about the infield. Chris Chelios, wearing a Ryan Dempster Cubs jersey, is parading the Stanley Cup around the pitchers mound. He throws out the first pitch and sails it over Eddie Vedder's head. Yes, this is all really happening.

ClubMedSux, yes, that guy in the bleachers had two arms. Wow. OK, I will say nothing more until this game starts in seven minutes. Perhaps I'll fix myself some tea.





Look for this special section in your
Baltimore Sun newspaper on Dec. 29, 2013.
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