By John Graham
Saget's stand-up performance at Lisner Auditorium will be one of his last for awhile. He'll be too busy working on a new HBO sitcom and a March of the Penguins parody. A few hours before he hit the stage in Cleveland, Metromix talked with Saget on the phone.
Metromix: When people come to see you do stand-up, do they finally understand it's not Danny Tanner?
Bob Saget: Once in a while, I get an interviewer like one I did for the radio this morning. "People don't know how dirty you are!" and I said, "I'm sorry to tell you this, but it was on the front of USA Today, so I think they do." Since Entourage and The Aristocrats, it brought out the comedy-philes. I was in Berkeley last week doing a school. Well, I didn't "do" the school. Not physically. OK, I did half the students.
Metromix: Now that audiences know you're not squeaky clean, do you get people thinking you're going to be the filthiest comedian alive?
BS: My stand-up is R-rated. My 18-year-old saw The Aristocrats and said, "Wow, that's a lot worse than your stand-up, Dad." My 16-year-old just had her Sweet Sixteen and came to see my stand-up. It was kind of her rite of passage.
Metromix: Tell me more about this HBO show you've got coming.
BS: I've got a studio audience. It's an R-rated sitcom, a brand new animal. I'm a divorced gynecologist with a son, and it's like an R-rated The Courtship of Eddie's Father and we're both coming of age and trying to figure out how to get laid and not get in trouble.
I've been offered all the crap that you would expect, every reality show, every game show, and, you know, cut to a year from now and I'll be hosting one of them. But right now I'm going to work passionately without doing anything but good work that I want to do now.
Metromix: Do you think you'll miss stand-up while you're working on the sitcom?
BS: Yes and no. I just love it. It's like punching a body bag. My adrenaline's flying. Nothing can stop me for that hour ... unless there's a power failure or someone pulls out a zip gun. Rodney Dangerfield was a friend of mine, and he would always say, "Just keep going. It's like punching a bag. Just keep going."
I officiated at Rodney's funeral. I was talking to Chris Rock and Jim Carrey. It's always painful to name drop. We were talking about Rodney, and I said, "There's very few comics that 20 minutes into their set, they compliment themselves. 'I got a lot of fucking jokes. I'm fucking funny, alright.'"
Jim Carrey and Chris Rock are celebrated as among the funniest people alive, and they also seem incredibly confident, but they would never go, "How fucking great am I?"
Metromix: Can you watch Full House when it comes on TV?
BS: I couldn't watch it when I did them. People say, "What was your favorite Full House episode?" I say, "The last one." I loved doing it. In retrospect, I couldn't be doing what I'm doing now if I hadn't done that.
Metromix: Are you still in touch with everyone?
BS: I talked with John [Stamos] all day.
Metromix: Really? What did you talk about? Spill it.
BS: Yesterday, he called me because I recommended my doctor. He didn't feel good, and he called me for directions. I said, "What am I, Mapquest?" We were over at Dave Coulier's house the other day and had a really good time. He's doing some satellite radio thing, so we're over there making fun of Dave. My daughter's getting bat mitzvahed next month, and everybody's coming to it. You'd be shocked how close we are. It's bizarre.
Metromix: I know you're protective of them, but how are the girls?
BS: They're good. Mary-Kate is in L.A. and Ashley is in New York. When my daughter started college in New York last month, they both took her to dinner. They grew up as little kids with her. It's strange. My joke about it is that Gary Coleman and Conrad Bain don't hang out. They don't go shoplifting together.
Metromix: I know you went to college at Temple. Did you get over to Baltimore or D.C. much?
BS: I actually did. I kept going to the Smithsonian, looking for John Dillinger's private parts. Which are not there. They said it was in formaldehyde. They lied.
I can't wait to play Lisner Auditorium. I've always been a friend and a fan of the Elliot in the Morning radio show, so when I go to D.C., I screw around there. I spend a lot of time in Baltimore, actually. The Scleroderma Research Foundation funds the Johns Hopkins Scleroderma Center, so I shot a video there to help promote us. [Saget's sister, Gay, died of the degenerative disorder.] I love that hospital. If you get a hangnail or a hemorrhoid, go there. In fact, if you have a hangnail and it's near your hemorrhoid, you could really hurt yourself.