A few weeks ago, Frank McCourt testified that he and Jamie withdrew $100 million dollars from the Dodger organization to fund their various personal activities, like buying extra houses and yelling at each other.
"YAM" was the entry on Jamie McCourt's diary. When asked what this meant, Jamie McCourt testified, "YAM means 'yelling at me.' Frank was yelling at me."
What a waste of $100 million! Not one dollar was spent on The Great Tower of Tuna.
That's right. Tuna.
The last Great Tower of Tuna was built in La Cañada in 2008. In November of that year, we asked each reader bring one can of tuna to the Valley Sun offices. In December of 2008, Miss Audrey Hepburn and I drove my Ford F-150 pick-up truck to the North Hollywood Interfaith Food Pantry to deliver 487 cans of tuna.
As for the McCourts, it is disheartening to learn that despite (surely) being regular readers of this column, they failed to bring cans of tuna to the Valley Sun offices in 2008. If they had donated a mere 10% of that $100 million for the Tower of Tuna, they would have had a wonderful tax deduction and the Dodgers would have won the 2009 World Series.
Back here in La Cañada, the tuna can collection resonated on many levels. My editor, Carol Cormaci, honestly did not know that 487 people read my column. Dear readers, your donations cemented my precarious relationship with the La Cañada Valley Sun. My second career was salvaged and I am profoundly grateful for your support!
Two years have passed and once again, it is time to create the Great Tower of Tuna at the La Cañada Valley Sun offices.
Sounds fishy? This is no joke.
Q. What did the tuna call the submarine?
A. A can of people.
Do not rely on Frank McCourt. He will fail you.
Do not rely on Jamie McCourt. She does not know the answer.
Q. How do fish start a business?
A. They start on a small scale!
We must rely on our own resources, not theirs. This year, the plan is to start early and donate often. The tower will begin in October.
Please stop by the Valley Sun offices to drop off two cans of tuna.
After Thanksgiving, I'll come by in my pick-up truck. I'll gaze upon a tower built from 974 cans of tuna. I will treasure each can. Then, Miss Hepburn and I will put them in the bed of the truck.
We will drive over to the to the North Hollywood Interfaith Food Pantry where the tuna will be distributed to the elderly and the poor.
TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE TOWER OF TUNA: Deliver cans of tuna (other canned foods gratefully accepted as well) to the La Cañada Valley Sun 727 Foothill Blvd., La Cañada Flintridge, CA 91011. Office hours are 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Friday. For more information call (818) 495-4440.
ANITA SUSAN BRENNER is a longtime La Cañada Flintridge resident and an attorney with Law Offices of Torres and Brenner in Pasadena. E-mail her at firstname.lastname@example.org.Copyright © 2015, The Baltimore Sun