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The Baltimore Sun

Small Headlines: Big Stars

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The gay community has a lot to be happy about these days, and apparently Tila Tequila is the reason behind it all. When speaking with Us Weekly about California making gay marriage legal, Tequila said, "It is because of me. I definitely think (my show) has helped the movement." Girl, the only movement you've helped is the one in my bowels. Her show, A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila, has something like ten dudes facing off against ten (mostly) lipstick lesbians for a chance to date Tila. Can someone PLEASE explain to me how this helped the gay movement? At all? If anything I'd say, "Thanks Tila! You've now set Americans back a few hundred years."

Tila Tequila may not be the real reason gay marriage has been given the thumbs up in California, but Amy Winehouse and Blake Civil Fielder may be. Let's face the facts, I'm pretty sure no one could be better poster children for equal marriage rights. Their love for each other is as large as their love of crack. In fact, the two will soon be renewing their wedding vows while Blake is still incarcerated. Nothing says love like matching track marks.

The Real World: Hollywood has lost another castmate. Joey Kovar has taken himself out of the house so as to not be around the out-of-control boozing of his roomates. He tells Us Magazine, "All the roommates had promised, 'Oh we're gonna change if you come back [from a stint in rehab],'" Kovar, 24, says. "It was just a bunch of b.s. 'cause nothing changed." NEWSFLASH: You all weren't cast on the show because of your intellectual superiority or senses of humor. No one wants to see seven strangers braiding each other's hair and playing Monopoly. You all were cast because you will eventually drink enough liquor to get arrested and possibly take home a tranny hooker. Then the rest of us can sit back and watch it over and over on Tivo and feel better about our lives. I applaud Joey for making steps towards sobriety and for getting out of the house. Now I can go back to watching the other idiots set themselves up for careers on other MTV-produced reality shows.

Jennifer Aniston allegedly threatened not to do a photo shoot for Marie Claire if Jennifer Connelly was part of it as well. The two Jennifers are starring in the upcoming film, He's Just Not That Into You. I just don't buy this though. I saw Aniston on Oprah after her divorce from Brad Pitt and she seemed like someone I'd want to party with. She was all about getting some Mexican food and drinking dirty martinis - which I can get down with. How could someone with such great taste in liquor have anything against one of the stars of Labyrinth?

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