Urban Liar hits new low by ratting out Gators

The Lakers have put up billboards around the LA area with a huge photo of Dwight and the word ''Stay.''

General manager Mitch Kupchak also told reporters when talking about Howard: ''The message is simple: we care about you and we want you to stay,'' Kupchak said.

Awww, isn't that sweet that the Lakers truly care about Dwight – a player who has been with them for, what, five minutes?

At least when the Magic were begging, it was the fans themselves who were recording songs ("Dwight Please Stay") and starting websites (StayDwight.com). The Lakers, though, are pandering and pleading as an organization. Isn't it sad that such an illustrious franchise finds it necessary to beg Dwight like some hobo panhandling for beer money.

Then again, this is the state of the NBA, where a diva player with no championships is more powerful than a storied franchise with 16 of them.

Mail bonding:

(Most interesting reader retorts, radio rabble, tangy tweets and message-board mockery of the week):

On Aaron Hernandez being charged with murder as an NFL player after a checkered stint at the University of Florida: "Time wounds all heels."

On Dwight Howard making the Lakers beg: "Are we in some alternative universe? This is like watching the Shot Doctor make Jessica Alba beg."

On the Jaguars making the decision to show the Red Zone Channel on the JumboTron during their home games. "Why would I want to buy tickets to go to a stadium and watch TV?"

Notable quotables:

(In honor of tonight's Coke Zero 400, three of my favorite quotes about Coca-Cola products:

"There are now more obese people in the United States than there are overweight people. I think it's safe to say that after all these years, Diet Coke is a complete failure." – Jay Leno

"Sailin' 'round the world in a dirty gondola. Oh, to be back in the land of Coca-Cola!" – Bob Dylan

"The only way that I could figure they could improve upon Coca-Cola, one of life's most delightful elixirs, which studies prove will heal the sick and occasionally raise the dead, is to put rum or bourbon in it." – Lewis Grizzard

mbianchi@tribune.com. Follow him on Twitter @BianchiWrites. Listen to his radio show every weekday from 6 to 9 a.m. on 740 AM.

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