Let's get down to business immediately. There *is a fool-proof way to win the Mega Millions world-record $540 million jackpot. Should we discuss the downsides, or how to get it done?!

How to get it done, indeed! Well, first, you have to have $176 million (simple, right?). And with that $176 million you have to buy every combination of ticket numbers out there.. since the odds are 1 in 176 million; thats how many tickets you'd be buying. And there! Its done! You'll have the winning ticket - guaranteed.

But, you would have nearly 176 million losing tickets. And subtract that from winning the *entire jackpot – which is $390 as a lump sum – and $293 million after federal taxes, you walk away with $117 million. Um, minus state taxes.

Now to fully execute this strategy, aside from having $176 million and a robust sense of optimism that you’ll be the sole winner… you’ll have to start filling out the lotto tickets soon. The Associated Press calculates at 5 seconds a ticket, it would take just 28 years to mark the bubbles on the game tickets. And be sure to give the merchant a heads-up so they don’t run out of paper and toner ink.

Some statistics to consider: Every media outlet has already told you that you are 50 times as likely to be struck by lightning than winning tonight. Don’t apply the logic that if you buy 50 tickets you equalize your chances of getting struck – tho it is true.

Also consider that according to government statistics, 1.7 automobile caused fatalities result from every 100 million vehicle-miles. If you drive one mile to the store to buy your ticket and return home, your chance of being killed – or killing someone else – is nearly 6 times *greater than your chance of winning the Mega Millions Jackpot.

Final thought: I won’t be finishing this part, as I have to give our office-Mega-coordinator Mark my $5. The way I see it, the cost of my daydreams today… and just in case.