Trick or tramp? When did women's Halloween costumes become so naughty?
naughty nurse (METRO / September 27, 2012)
Last weekend, my son, Thom, 3, with his newly found fascination of the classic film, told me he wanted to be a Munchkin for Halloween. He thought I should be Dorothy.
I found plenty of tips to help turn Thom into a member of the Lollipop Guild. However, when it came to Dorothy, my memory of her outfit must have been off. According to search results, I needed to wear a revealing top, thigh-highs and ruby heels. And Dorothy's classic gingham jumper barely covered her bottom.
I wonder what this Dorothy carried in her basket.
Auntie Em surely wouldn't approve. Nor would the neighbors handing out candy to my Munchkin once they caught a glimpse of me.
If you're female, good luck if you plan on taking a trip this season to the Halloween costume shop.
Did you know that female prison guards wear knee-high boots, short skirts and push up bras? So do nurses. Witches these days wear basically the same, just in black.
A coworker of mine said she purposely set out a few years ago to wear the un-sexiest costume she could think of -- a pumpkin. She stuffed a giant orange pumpkin garbage bag full of leaves. When she showed up at a party that night, there was a girl with, you guessed it, a "sexy" pumpkin costume from the Halloween shop.
Some women say they look forward to wearing these types of costumes since Halloween is the one night they are able to dress this way in public. Of course the men I know just say, "What's the problem?"
But you can't blame the men for this female Halloween costume epidemic. Go to any bar or party on Halloween and you'll find women more than willing to play the part of the dirty schoolgirl or naughty superhero. Even Dorothy from Kansas is sexy on Halloween.
Hey ladies, if you're wearing one of these costumes and a guy hits on you this Halloween, you should probably ask if he's allowed within a certain range of school buildings.
Maybe this year, women should celebrate humor and creativity, not curves and skin.
You never see Rosie the Riveter, Rosa Parks or Madeleine Albright costumes on Halloween.
Here's an idea -- if you want to be a nurse, wear baggy scrubs to the party and walk around taking everyone's height and weight. Take some drink orders and say you'll be back in a few minutes. Then return 45 minutes later -- like a real nurse.
Save the $39.99 you'd spend on one-size-fits-all pleather and itchy stockings that will just leave you with cold, frostbit skin this Halloween. And remember that brains are sexy year-round.
Rachel Brougham writes about a number of topics in this column, which appears each Thursday. E-mail her at firstname.lastname@example.org, or follow her at @RachelBrougham on Twitter.