All day Tuesday, they came to the Grand Cru wine bar with swollen red eyes, hugging one another and trying to make sense of the loss of a good friend and boss.

They lifted a glass and reminisced about Nelson Carey, the genial and worldly publican of Belvedere Square, whose Grand Cru has been a popular destination for a decade.

Mr. Carey, whose European-style wine bar and patisserie was more than a home away from home for an eclectic and devoted band of regulars, died early Tuesday of heart failure at Greater Baltimore Medical Center. The Timonium resident was 50.

"I got a phone call at 9 a.m. about Nelson, and we immediately came over and there was a crowd in front of the store, customers and staff, and they were all smoking cigarettes, hugging and crying," said Greg Novik, a longtime friend who owns Greg's Bagels, also in Belvedere Square.

"For 11 years, the guy has been my guidepost, benchmark and the dearest human being," said Mr. Novik. "He had a way of making everyone feel as though they were his best friend."

Early Tuesday afternoon, Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake stopped by for a few minutes.

"She came here to say her condolences," said Charlie Vascellaro, a Baltimore writer and longtime Grand Cru bartender.

"Grand Cru had character and a synergy all of its own. It was laid-back and eclectic, much like Nelson," said John F. Klaus, manager of The Prime Rib. "It was the kind of place where you could always get a good glass of wine, cocktail and food, which isn't the case in most bars."

The son of Thomas Nelson Carey Jr., a chemical salesman, and Sarah Marie "Sally" Carey, secretary at Old St. Paul's Episcopal Church, Thomas Nelson Carey III was born in Baltimore and raised in the Lake Falls neighborhood of Baltimore County.

Mr. Carey, who never used his first name, was a 1982 graduate of Loyola High School, and four years later earned a bachelor's degree in psychology from what is now Loyola University Maryland.

"Nelson always loved food, wine and cooking, and after college went to work in Rhode Island," said Barbara Porter Carr, his mother-in-law, who lives in Lutherville.

Mr. Carey's formal education in the restaurant and wine business began at the Mooring Restaurant Seafood Kitchen & Bar in Newport, R.I. After a few years, he moved to New York City, where he worked in management and took food classes.

"He was bitten by the food bug, and that was the only thing he wanted to do," said his wife of 21 years, the former Christy Beers.

"Nelson was the kind of guy who was comfortable in any situation wherever he went," said Dave O'Ferrall, Mr. Carey's business partner and a boyhood friend. "Of course, his passions in life were food and wine."

Mr. Carey returned to Baltimore and went to work as a salesman for Bacchus Importers Ltd. In the 1990s, he helped establish and manage North Charles Liquors, part of Eddie's of Roland Park.

Mr. Carey purchased Fink's Discount Liquors on Falls Road near Lake Avenue after the death of its longtime owner and renamed it The Old Vine.

Mr. Carey decided to open Grand Cru in 2003.

"Nelson wanted to create a place he'd like to go to and hang out and spend time with people. That was the philosophy behind Grand Cru. He wanted a like-minded atmosphere," Mr. Vascellaro said.

"We opened in November and we had only eight wines on the list, used a computer to print out menus, and were trying to get bottles on the shelf. We weren't sure anyone would even come," recalled Mr. Vascellaro. "The place was really a reflection of his personality."

Grand Cru was the kind of place where artists, writers, educators, musicians, senior citizens and reporters mixed easily with politicians, businessmen, doctors and eccentrics.