Pam Bondi delays execution so she can party

Fortunately for Bondi, she's a Republican — and Florida's Democrats are so incompetent that they couldn't find their own rear ends if you spotted 'em both cheeks.

Still, Bondi will probably ultimately face someone — thanks partly to this episode.

The attack ad practically writes itself …

It would open with weeping members of the victim's family. Then a shot of the execution chamber. A close-up of the terrified convict strapped to a gurney. Tension builds. More weeping.

Finally, the bat phone rings (red with a blinking light). The warden answers, looks puzzled and says: "Halt the execution? Why?"

Cut to a smirking Bondi actor, who winks at room full of fat-cat, check-cutting special interests and says: "Let's just say I have something more important to do."

The warden shrugs. The weeping intensifies. And the ad fades out with Bondi sipping champagne as dollar bills rain down like confetti.

Bondi must know this is coming. She actually apologized — after she was caught and started taking heat.

I'm not sure how much comfort that brings to Phyllis Novick — the Ohio mother of the woman who was strangled, stabbed and left dead in a South Florida trash heap.

When told by the Times why the execution of her daughter's killer had been delayed, she asked: "What's going on down there?"

What went on, Ms. Novick, was that our attorney general decided she had a party to attend.

smaxwell@tribune.com

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