These four - two of whom will be named, and two who spoke on condition of anonymity because their lives are still so close to the drug trade - were among 10 men who contacted this columnist after Thursday's open letter to the dealers of Baltimore.
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Of the 10, one had already moved on and found a job; the rest said they were unemployed. Two claimed they were still selling the poison to city and suburban customers. Others said they didn't want to deal anymore but were frustrated in finding a legitimate job because of their criminal backgrounds. Such is the complex challenge of breaking the cycle of drug dealing that infests the toughest, poorest neighborhoods in Baltimore.
Theodore Anderson
Twice since 1975, when he pleaded guilty to second-degree murder, Anderson held jobs for several years. He was 15 when he stabbed another young man in a fight - he says it was self-defense - and went to jail for eight years. After prison, he found a position as a deliveryman for a Baltimore furniture store and kept it for seven years. For another five, Anderson worked for a company that reconditioned steel drums.
But the soft-spoken Anderson acknowledges that too much of his life has been spent in prison. Now 44, he says he can't do another stint. "I have four children," he says. "I got to find some way to help with my family."
Anderson was incarcerated until April 2004. He says he forged prescriptions for OxyContin and Percocet, powerful painkillers that are often sold illegally. Until he was caught, Anderson says, he received $100 for each successful forgery. A street dealer then sold the pills at significant markup.
He's been through detoxification and now wants a job. He's applied to a dairy, a scrap yard and a stationery company but has not been invited for an interview and blames his criminal past.
Anderson earns a few bucks doing odd jobs, but that's it. Asked if he's tempted to return to the narcotics trade, he says, "That's not the solution. I finally figured that out. I can't do jail time anymore. It's not doing my family any good."
Sean
This man, 26 years old, did not want his full name in print. He says he's still too close to his former life as a busy heroin salesman, and he's lucky to be alive. He was on the street with his best friend - "my home boy" - one night in March 2004 when gunfire erupted. His friend died from multiple wounds. Sean was grazed in the attack. He says the experience changed his life.
"I been to the birthday parties of all my home boy's kids," he says, "and they all call me `god-daddy,' and they were all at the funeral. ... Since my home boy was killed, I've been chillin'. ... I've been on the streets sellin' since I was 14 and what do I have to show for it? Nothin'. I'm tellin' you, I seen a light when my home boy died."
Sean, who has an extensive criminal record, lives with his mother. He has a daughter he sees on weekends; he says she's another reason he resolved to stop dealing.
Others, he says, aren't as strong and will keep going back to the corners.
"People think we [sell drugs] to just come outside and be tough or hard. We do it to survive. Right now, there isn't much food in my mother's house, you know? That's why I'd have to do it."
But he says he's not going to. He wants to find a legitimate job - "Almost anything, but not cleaning toilets" - while he attends a technical school in South Baltimore.
"I have to start over," he says. "I'm just done [with drug dealing], done with the whole thing."
Donyell
