Everyone knows that a picture is worth a thousand words. Everyone knows that Helen of Troy had the face that launched a thousand ships. Put the two together in today’s world and you have — ta da! — Gisele Bundchen, the woman who sparked a thousand-tweet Twitter war.
To guys, Bundchen is beautiful, Brazilian and a Brady — at least, that is how most American men know her, as the supermodel wife of Tom Brady, quarterback extraordinaire of the New England Patriots. (What can I say? We’re men — we’re shallow.)
But among women, she’s known as a big breastfeeding advocate. And this week, an attempt to promote that cause went, well, awry when she sent out a photo of herself breastfeeding the couple’s 1-year-old daughter. She captioned it: “What would I do without this beauty squad after the 15 hours flying and only 3 hours of sleep #multitasking #gettingready.”
Ooops. As they say in the NFL, “fuuummmble!” Notice that #multitasking? Well, as you can see in the video above, someone (or several someones) is multitasking, but it ain’t Bundchen.
In the Twittersphere, this became what we used to call “big news.” (Now, I suppose, it’s “big bytes” or “big hits” or even, if we’re being honest, “click bait.”) Some, like actress Emmy Rossum of “Shameless,” had fun with it, doing her own parody photo. But a lot of just-regular moms adopted Queen Victoria’s mantra: We are not amused:
“My multitasking usually includes dressing myself and two kids, making two breakfasts and lunches, cleaning up dropped clothes and dishes, brushing out hair while I struggle shoes and coats onto kids ... Can we trade !?!”
“This is so hilarious! Real multitasking is breastfeeding while breaking up a fight between the older two and pouring cereal at the same time. Then change a diaper while pulling an old fruit snack out of your bra. To each their own.”
Male reaction was, not surprisingly, harder to come by. Though I did find this comment — which lacked a certain, uh, sensitivity — on The Times’ website; “sright180” opined: “Geez — and I thought that my ex-wife was high maintenance!”
I suspect this lack of reaction from men stems from one of two factors. Either 1) they looked at the photo while at work — that’s the male version of multitasking — and then were busy forwarding it to their pals, complete with rude and sophomoric comments (tip to women: men just get older, they don’t grow up); or 2) it reminded them to look up who New England plays this weekend, and to call their bookies.
Of course, it’s also true that, when it comes to breastfeeding — well, you might say that men just don’t have a dog in this fight. Though I’m sure more than a few husbands will struggle to answer this awkward question: “So, dear, why don’t I have a crew like Giselle to multitask for me?”
But all is not lost, ladies. I’m sure that looking at that picture, at least a few guys were thinking: “Holy cow, I haven’t gotten anything for Christmas yet for my little honey bunny; wonder if she’d like a spa day?”
So thanks, Gisele. Oh, and tell Tom I’m taking New England this weekend against the Dolphins.